If she has a boyfriend, why's she making such a stink about me meeting women?

She used to have a crush on me, and I could tell, so I was careful what I said 'cause she'd get jealous at the drop of a hat. She started dating someone and now if I meet women she makes a huge stink, and snaps at me like I'm doing something wrong. She's allowed to date, but I'm not, I guess. Why's she acting like that? Guys tell me she wants my 'D' but if she wanted it that bad she wouldn't have started dating someone else. Any idea why a girl would act that possessive and jealous toward me, when she's dating another guy? Why would she care so much what I do? We never dated, so I don't see why she's acting like that.

We are coworkers and there are strict rules. Close enough age, but I'm a superior at work.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Some people are just like that. Even if they're over someone (or at least claim to be over) there's still a chance these people will feel like they have some kind of claim on their crushes, or exes. It's not rational, but that's how people are. Almost like they want to move on, but want the former object of their affections to stay interested in them, and pine after them until they die alone. OK, OK, OK, maybe I am being a tad cynical, but sometimes it just feels that way.

    As I was saying though, it's not rational. It's not fair. It's just how some people are wired. But truthfully, even if they admit it or not, if they're really getting so pissy about this, the reality is, they're not really over it. Your friend? I don't think she's entirely over you. I don't know why she's still attached, but she is. I don't know why you two never happened, or if you did, I don't know why it ended (And do you think you can give me a little more info on that, please? Like why didn't you happen, if you knew she liked you?) but no matter what happened, clearly she's not over you. On some level, even if it's minor, she still wants you.

    Anyway, I don't know the full story here, but all I can surmise from what you've given me, is that she's still into you on at least some level. Yes, she's with someone else. Yes it's a little selfish and possessive, but hey, I'm calling 'em like I see 'em.

    • I'm her superior at work.

    • Yeah, that would do it. Then yeah, I am thinking she's just sore about not being able to have you. It's possible she's just jealous because she can't have you. She might have even settled for this guy, but whatever the reason is irrelevant. Yeah it sucks, but whatever the reason, I think it comes down to her still kinda wanting you on some level.


Have an opinion?


Send It!

What Girls Said 1

  • She feels she owns your ass somehow. Minimize your contact with her


What Guys Said 2

  • Some people have such a high degress of narcissism to the point where they have irrational tendencies. Everyone must love that person, praise that person, and think ever so highly of that person. She wants you to be so into her yet she wants to do what she wants. I would not be surprised if she is with the guy and wants you to be "jealous" about it.

  • She just want your attention for herself.

    You just have to date other women disregarding her words.