Girls, would you act this way if you liked someone?

I dated this chick for a month (we're mid 20s) before we stopped. Since then, we've had our ups and downs but we are talking again and seemingly closer than before. She stated weeks ago we are "just friends" and no longer dating.However, she has mentioned that she has thought about having me sleep over on occasions. Why would a girl be thinking this if she "feels no spark at all"? Not to mention, the last time we went out to the movies we were holding hands for a while before the movie started. A few days ago, we went out and she said she wanted me to stay over. I agreed and stayed with her for the night, during which we held helds quite a bit and we cuddled the entire night. Does she have feelings for me? If so, why would she deny and say otherwise? Logically, as a guy, it makes no sense. Mind you, the last serious relationship she had was years ago and she was very hurt when she broke up with her ex. Thanks for your thoughts!


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It seems to me like she is only protecting herself and she wants to find out everything she needs to before trying to see if you could build a relationship, my advice is to just go along with it and make sure she feels completely safe and trusts you, then she might open up and tell you if she really feels something but try not to fall for her to bad yourself else you might be the one that gets hurt if she really doesn't want anything, also if she's still being the same as this in a months time then confront her and tell her she can't keep messing around with you and you want a simple yes or no answer, she isn't trying to hurt or confuse you but I'm afraid that's always the case with situations like this, hope this helps.

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What Girls Said 7

  • Would a girl sleep over or have a guy sleep over in the same bed if she has no feelings at all?
    Possibly because she considers you a friend maybe likens you to a brother or in my opinion naively and misguidedly believes a male friend can be trusted to actually sleep in the same bed similar to a female friend.

    Why would a girl be thinking this if she "feels no spark at all"?
    Depends on why she wants you to sleep over. If it's to cuddle then probably because she's seeking intimacy and gals often are affectionate. If it's to makeout then she's bsing about feeling no spark at all.

    Does she have feelings for me? If so, why would she deny and say otherwise?
    Toss up on if she has feelings for you. If she does she may deny and say otherwise because she's already been there and done that with you and doesn't want to go there again so she's fighting her feelings by twisting it to just wanting a friend's comfort.

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  • I think she's confused because of how comfortable she feels around you. Maybe even not as much as when you were dating. She might really want to be just friends but then when she sees how good things are and question if maybe you should be together, but then remembers that it didn't work out before and that there's no point. If you call that insecurity, than she is, she unsure of what's right. She sounds really nice but has some baggage and is holding on to you for your friendship unsure if it's love. But there's slightly a chance of her just holding on to you as an option ...like using you not purposely judging by this story and the things she's saying. You can't blame her if she does it for that reason, if she has emotional baggage insecurities and somewhat confusion over life, over you. You just gotta be her friend and hold that ground for now. Anything that happens have to be her idea, for wanting you back or go different path from you. Otherwise it could grow to a bad bad ending. It's my 2 cents.

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  • To me she sounds confused. It seems like she still has feelings for you but doesn't have a desire to be in a relationship.

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  • She might just like having someone there for her, it's comforting, but if you still like her and want to get her back try giving her some space, improving on what ever made you guys break up ( if its attraction show her Subtly that your a hunk) and show her a new stonger side of you like your winning life as a independent man, don't make it seem like you want her back or your trying to hard its a really big turn off.

    She has that potential to like you a lot and want to be with you but she need some space give her something to chase, it'll drive her love crazy

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  • well she obviously likes you on some level or she wouldn't keep asking you to stay over. why don't you try talking to her again and see where she's at? you didn't say if you want an actual relationship with her but I'm assuming since you are confused about her that you do, so just try talking and seeing if she would like that too. I know if I had NO feelings either romantically or even just sexually, I wouldn't want to have multiple sleepovers with a guy, hold hands with him, etc., so my guess is that she does like you but is just scared because of her past relationship to get into a new one with you

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  • She doesn't want to be in a committed relationship but she is lonely and enjoys your company.

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    • so no feelings at all then?

    • There are some feelings but she wouldn't state that you guys were friends if she wanted anything more. Sounds more like she wants a fwb.

  • Maybe she's just testing the waters, and seeing if there is truly nothing there. If you still feel for her, let her know, so you can be sure she isn't just looking for a friends with benefits thing from you.

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What Guys Said 1

  • She really does seem interested in you.

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