Aspergers. I don't tell them but it has implications that don't go unnoticed. I might be bipolar, and these disabilities make it incredibly hard for me to find a job. Some jobs, like with lots of face to face customer service (which loads of jobs have) are practically impossible for me to do. Dealing with strangers face to face sometimes makes me feel ill, makes my head hurt... It's crazy.
And yeah I know I would struggle so painfully much to work full time, so I've been unemployed for quite a while, and basically I think girls as soon as they learn this about me, instead of giving me a chance and trying to get to know me I think they just decide they're not interested anymore. I'm thinking this is especially happening on an online dating site I use. They don't even stick around long enough to learn that I was almost killed, by people, a couple years ago and that my recovery from that alone took a long time and that I still have problems left over from that, both physical (head aches, jaw aches) and psychological. And when this happened I had to quit the job I had at the time.
I don't think girls are even willing to give me a chance when they find out I'm unemployed and not a student. I mean I am studying but I'm not a Uni student or a full time student of any kind.
I want to think that it isn't so that all girls are so quick to make a decision, to decide that someone doesn't deserve attention, but I'm finding it hard to believe this at the moment.
This isn't a question. More of a what advice do ya got? So that's what this is really.
Most Helpful Girl
I understand your difficulties as a fellow Aspie. Generally, when developing a friendship with someone, I explain to them what Asperger's is and let them know of odd behaviors or difficulties that I may encounter ahead of time so that they aren't freaked out if I act a bit oddly. This way, they are informed. I think a large majority of the population doesn't understand exactly what Asperger's is, which is part of the problem.
Online sites can be great for making internet friends, but I think it would be best for you not to look online for a significant other because people may be startled when you meet in real life and you are not necessarily as social as you were on the internet. Instead, seek friends who are accepting of your Asperger's and let a relationship naturally evolve from there.
Try not to blame people though if they are uninterested because of your Asperger's. Just as some girls may not be attracted to a short guy or a guy with blond hair, some women just won't be attracted to Aspies. It isn't necessarily that they are shallow, they just won't find it attractive. In this situation, I don't generally get offended because people can't help what they are attracted to.
Do you have a special interest? (I assume you know what this is if you have Asperger's.) Mine personally is music, so I generally look for a guy who enjoys the same type of music as me. That way, if I begin obsessing over it, he is somewhat interested. Perhaps join clubs or try to meet people who are interested in your special interest!
Best of luck. :)2
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