Guys have you ever been told you were good looking to date but

The girl who told you that, still rejected you? What I don't get is why would a girl/women say that to a guy just to turn him down? To me those are the most hateful women I know their right up there with Feminist, and gold diggers. I've been told I'm cute, good looking and my favorite because I laugh Handsome all not true. Do they really believe/think I'm really that stupid to believe it? Why can't women/girls just be honest with me and tell me what they really think of me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It sounds like they friend zoned you because you weren't attractive to them, and then they try to boost your ego/confidence to go find a girl (just not them). Girls tell their girlfriend that they are cute, pretty, etc. and that men are just intimidated by them all the time... I guess you're getting treated like one of the girls with sympathy compliments.

    I don't have that happen to me. From my experience, when girls actually find you attractive they don't tell you until way down the road. They don't seem to like to admit it directly in words. They'll subtly hint at it though and compliment your eyes, your voice, your smile, how strong you are, how tall you are, etc.

    You might want to stop trying to be their friends to get close to them. Just make your moves quicker. You'll still likely get rejected by a number of girls, but at least you won't invest time in girls that aren't interested in you and won't get hit with a snow job.

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    • Its like I said women and girls like the ones you described, are the worst. What pisses me off the most is women/girls are always complaining when a guy is never honest but yet there they are lying up a storm like its the end of the world. Women to me=hypocrites.

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    • Hmmm, well that's kind of a harsh opinion to have of yourself. It might be turning some women off. It also might be why you get pity compliments from some women. More confidence in yourself leads to a better image, and less bullsh*t to try and cheer you up.

    • Its a lot easy when your around a bunch of people 5 days a week. Your gonna run into someone sooner or later.

What Girls Said 7

  • SO, women are complimenting your looks, but then you ask them out and they say no? How often does that happen? Maybe they have boyfriends? Or maybe they are doing Stuff (you know, Life Stuff) and can't balance a relationship with all the Stuff they have going on?

    Because what you're saying... it seems odd. I mean, they find you attractive (so they say) and then when you show interest, they back right off of you? Strange.

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    • Life stuff? I've only been told that stuff online but never in person. But it is the web so they could be lying to spare my feelings makes me sick to my stomach.

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    • Uh, I don't think its my job to back up what *you* said. Also, my dad gave me some advice years ago that has really helped me when dealing with people. I will share it with you now. He said "Arguing with some folks is like rasslin with a pig. You get all dirty and the pig likes it."

    • But your still a female.

  • It means there is physical attraction but emotional wise we feel nothing, we don't fancy you nor see you in our future, they are not hateful though nor up their ass so don't assume that about people, I feel that you are very scared of rejection and we all are but every girl can't feel the same way as you do but you have to slow when too when trying to look for someone, you might be rejected but can you actually say yourself you felt enough of a connection with girls who told you that at all?, you can't really feel anything so quickly for a girl you have to get to know them first without any pressure or expectations, making it obvious is the worst turn off believe me. I can see where your coming from about wanting the truth as I have had guys myself who are too afraid to directly tell me why (most of the time they just ignore me leaving me without answers which is rude but to them it just seems easier which is rather shallow). There is more to it than just looks and that is having a good personality with quite a good head on your solders, I know a lot of people try to show off with their looks and pretend they got all their clothes from the most expensive shops when it was actually from Top Shop or Asda lol but it is not the real them and being the same way is a terrible turn off as well because we can see under all that you are very insecure and your trying to hide that from the world but it just makes it more obvious, people want to see who you are in and out of home not you at home then someone else outside, most live double lives though and I can honestly say it is not a person I would even consider dating, not even if we were last people on earth I still would not create babies with them.

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    • Sorry but Looks will always be important to males and females. The person can be the nicest person and if their not good looking, they will always get rejected.

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    • "Of course guys are gonna ask you out your female. Women never ask out guys unless he's super hot or rich or both. If you want to know what I look like Message me and you'll see."

      News flash: In recent eons, we males are the pursuers. Women may never *approve* guys unless they are super hot or rich or both, but they never *ask out* guys. The asking out is up to you.

    • Actually these days girls so a lot of the asking out because guys push themselves down before they ask us out, they already start thinking were already with someone just because were cute, I get no movement from guys whatever, not any genuine perusing anyway I mostly jsut get guys doing it to not seem obvious about wanting to sleep with me lol. I have asked a guy out before, didn't go well but I would do it again if I felt strong enough about who they are.

  • There's a difference between being a hot guy and a guy we want to date.

    I know a lot of good looking guys. Cute. Hot. Sexy. It doesn't mean I want to date them. There's a lot more to it than just looks.

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    • well then it's different for you than me, because that's not how I work things at all.

    • Yeah those guys you described have to be muscular and rich.

  • Looks aren't everything. They might be trying to let you down nicely or think they're being constructive by saying that, as opposed to just point-blank shooting you down.

    Maybe you are very attractive but just not their type or ticking enough of their boxes in the personality department for them to consider you relationship-material. Just sex-partner material for raw attraction. There's far more to a healthy relationship thatn just that.

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    • Looks aren't everything? So your telling me, if you saw two guys walking down the street Ones a tall muscular model with a great looking face and the other is Average in height, a little overweight and as an average looking face, you wouldn't pick the first one?

    • I wouldn't "pick" a guy.

      Technically that's also not my type but I'll go with your scenario and say that I'm attracted to the stereotypically "attractive" male. If I purely saw them on the street and was going to approach whom I was most interested in, I would go for the one I'd find more attractive. Sure. That doesn't mean I wouldn't give the other the time of day. That also doesn't mean I wouldn't find out if I was compatible as a friend with either of them before anything serious.

  • Youre simply not their type. They want to point out your good side, so that they don't come off as harsh. Before they get to the "bad" side...not really bad, they didn't say there's something WRONG with you, implying they probably just don't CLICK with you...the bad side of this situation being that you guys just aren't compatible (as far as you guys know each other). There are other fish in the sea :) at least they are not leading you on right?

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  • What do you think holds a relationship together? Looks? hell no..

    attraction is the first step but personality is the deciding factor.

    they are being honest with you, they think you are good looking but for them they want something different personality wise

    Why do you not believe that you are good looking? Its not a right thing to say to turn someone down unless your being honest.

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    • Looks don't hold a relationship together? You can't be serious? You wouldn't stay with someone who was ugly. I don't feel or believe they are being serious with me. I'm not some little kid I'm a grown ass man and I should hear the truth. I've been ugly my whole life that's why I believe it.

  • What is the whole story though? Was this female a friend of yours ?

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What Guys Said 8

  • I've been there. Why they might say that:

    1. They actually *do* mean what they say, but they still can do better anyway.

    2. They are gold diggers as you pointed out, and you have none or not enough gold to dig.

    3. They are trying to be "nice", and really don't mean it.

    By the way, If they actually are femi(commu)nist bitches, they are doing you a favor. Avoid leftist crap like the plague.

    Anyway, try dating online. Avoid situations like work or school where public rejection is likely.

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  • Who knows. Maybe they don't want to see you cry.

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  • Yes, it happened to me. After all, you can't cater to everybody's preference because each person is unique.

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  • you may very well be good looking. but not attractive to them. there's lots of women who are good looking , but I wouldn't date them. because they are either too innocent, too boring, too plain, stupid or unambitious, etc.

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  • Clearly she just wanted a free meal.

    Don't date.

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  • I've never been told good looking enough to date. Some people find others good enough looking to date, but they just don't click with a person's personality or the way they act just isn't someone they are looking for. Or they could just be saying it to be nice. Guess it would depend what the conversation was when they brought it up.

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    • I would rather hear I'm ugly and not datable then hear how cute I am when its not even true.

  • Looks aren't everything.

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  • looks aren't everything yo

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