Okay, I heard before that some guys don't go for their type to keep up appearances. For instance, I heard that some guys will date skinny chicks to impress their friends, but cheat on the girl with fat girls because those are his real "type," and he's too embarrassed to announce his preference to the world.
So, is this a common thing? Or not that common? I'm not saying all guys do this, this is just something I heard and have never seen/experienced myself. I personally think people should go for their specific type, and I refuse to date guys who prefer a different phenotype from mine, haha.
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Not to go off-message, Makato-why?... but 1diamond makes a pretty good point below.
She said it when she talked about arm candy. There's an element of truth to that.
It takes a certain maturity and experience- on anyone's behalf- to get past the need for ego-stroking.
We are attracted to who we are- but not all of them are worth it in the end. We sometimes stay anyway...longer than we ought to. It kind of reminds me of the song by Simply Red- the lyrics: "You're so beautiful- but oh so boring... and I'm wondering what am I doing here..."
In my early 20s I was a wild man... lots of girls... stunningly beautiful girls, mostly. I wasn't shallow. I tried every which way never to be a jerk. I just adored women- especially pretty ones. I liked the way they looked on my arm- and the admiring glances (we) got from men and women alike. It was a heady feeling. If nothing else, it bred confidence.
Still- what I always adored most about women- and still do to this day- is who they were/are, as the fascinating creatures they often are... inside.
Sure- not all ladies are so awesome as all that- but women ARE special... and in some ways quite different to men.
After a few poor experiences along the way- I have clearly learned that physical beauty is indeed skin deep... while true beauty always lies within the person themselves: the warmth, devotion, caring, dependability, kindness and generosity- of their time, their spirit, and their love. When you start to look at people in that way, then what they look like on the outside really doesn't matter.
What's a few pounds or a funny nose?
This "not caring" is the REAL self confidence that experience teaches.