So in the 3 and half years since splitting with my ex of one year I've genuinely being interested in about 2 girls and of these 2 things didn't work out. What I mean by 'genuinely' is that from the start I knew I was willing to make the effort to commit to a relationship and there was never any doubt in my mind as to whether or not I could see myself being with them in the long term.
There's being many more girls whose numbers I've gotten, I'm attracted to them but I wonder if it was just lust (i.e just wanting to have sex with them) rather than genuine interest as I play back and forth in my mind whether I could go out with them.
Anyway we text back and forth for awhile but I always just either tone the messaging down and give off that I'm not interested or in a worse case scenario I just stop texting back. But when I usually end up seeing them at the club I work in I'm all friendly and great with them and this just makes them cling onto hope sometimes and its just a repeat till they end up meeting someone else or hating me.
I'm not going to defend my actions, I'm a horrible person I know and I'm sure I deserve this predicament I'm in but plenty women have done it to me in the past so I know how it feels, I'm not unsympathetic to what I put these girls through, however in my defense I haven't slept with any of these girls or even gone out on dates with them so I haven't strung them too much along.
Yet if one of these girls moves on (which I usually see through Facebook) it cuts me deep and makes me feel anger, in general and towards them, and jealousy but I have no reason to feel these least of all anger at the girl as it was my choice and actions that lead to this, they have done nothing wrong.
Why do I only become interested in these girls when I can't have them ? Or am I answering my own question there ?
Most Helpful Girl
Yep. You're a jerk. You won't let anyone in. You might dump them, yes, they get hurt, but they get over it quickly enough and move on. You end up alone. You should change your attitude. You will never be happy if you dont. I knew a guy like you.. always flirting with girls, but never being serious with one. I don't know whatever happened to him... but I'm quite happy I didn't waste too much time holding on to "hope".. instead I moved on to the next one. And I'm happy.1
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