Any advice for inexperienced men? Men without any dating/relationship experience.

Any general do's or don't for those first few stages of learning? Any advice for us guys that made it well into adulthood without experiencing the opposite sex and are still struggling with it?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Read: link (get the full book if you can; written by a woman who was a psychiatrist, and specialized in female psychology).

    Next, understand, accept, and come to terms with the fact that men and women communicate differently. Therefore, don't place ANY VALUE WHATSOEVER on anything women "tell" you. What women "say" is true, and what is actually true, are not always the same thing. Instead, you are more likely to discover the truth about how women think (and what their preferences, motivations, and beliefs are) by studying their actual "choices" and "actions" they take.

    Next, study a little bit of moral philosophy. Definitely don't get lost in the trees, just try to appreciate the whole forest. This is important so you understand "emotional arguments" and can recognize them and respond appropriately to them in real life. Realism: seeks to find the truth; truth is the only goal. Constructivism: seeks to maximize social utility; works backwards to find a definition of what is "good" based on what will benefit society as a whole the most. Expressivism: Merely expresses one's personal beliefs or opinions on what "good" or "bad" is, and then tries to find reasons to justify who others should accept that definition as true. Expressivism also has a manipulative side to it (think religion): one can be pretending or masquerading as a realist or constructivist, in order to gather social support for what is really just their own self-interested definition of what "good" or "bad" is. (Example: little boys just want sex; real men are not afraid of commitment and aspire to marry a woman.)

    Next, grab a few books:

    link (learn how to be immune to these sorts of influence techniques)

    link (learn how to negotiate)

    link (learn how to not be afraid to ask for what you want)

    link (learn how to avoid artificial road-blocks to getting what you want)

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What Girls Said 1

  • 1. Always be honest. No matter what honesty is always better than lying. Most likely we'lll find out either wa, so even if it makesus mad at the moment we'll respect the fact you were honest and we found out from you.

    2. Don't stop doing little things. Always remeber even though to you it may seem repetitive or stupid most women still care about the little things guys do.

    3. Always notice us. Women love it when a guy notices the differeces in the way we dress, act, or do anything. It shows you pay attention and care

    4. Keep trying and learning. If you always shoow that you're making a true effort we will appreciate at your try. And never stop learning things about your girl. A continued interest in her will make her feel special and like you care. Besides there's alway things to learn about women.

    5. Listen. This is not fine on its own listening to her needs, problems, or thoughts are key to lletting a women know you care. And also acting on your listening skills like applying what she said or bringing up something later to show you were listening and that you understand her is always good.

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What Guys Said 5

  • I won't go into do's and don'ts but I did want to point out that I've seen many questions like this; several tonight alone! This is far more common than you might realize. I do hope you don't consider it a failing somehow. There are those who know what they're doing; there are those who feel lost on this and there are those who don't know what they're doing so they fake it. You're much better off in the second category than the third! And be mindful of those in the third category who dispense advice. Good advice should feel right to who you are.

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  • just don't be clingy or needy then id say you're golden ;) also start chatting up women that are in your life right now, you can do it. they are normal people just like everybody else

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  • Get over your fear of rejection. Immediately.

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  • Simply start going out to dates.

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  • hate how I was not born a natural

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