Is this normal for a second date?

I went on a second date with a guy last night, about a week after the first date that went really well (one that we kissed at the end of). Last night we went to a movie and met for drinks about a hour before the movie. We chatted for a little bit before the movie, but we obviously didn't really talk during the movie. Our arms were touching the entire movie, but no other physical contact.

After the movie, he said he is going to head home because he is really tired (he was up at 3:00 am for work). I asked if he wanted to grab dinner early next week and he said he would if he's not traveling for work, but just doesn't know yet. He told me he'd talk to me later, then he gave me a small peck on the lips and left.

Is that normal for a 2nd date? I feel like maybe he's loosing interest in me because he didn't want to hang out after. Is really just tired, or is he blowing me off?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm left with this: he really put out for you, making the effort to go out with you eventhough he was really tired. I would wait a few days and just send him a nice message thanking him for seeing you under those circumstances.

    I had a woman blow off her mom's party because of me. Now, while this was not the greatest idea perhaps, it does show commitment and that is pretty much all you have to go on: the things people DO for you. Never mind their words. How much are they willing to rearrange their busy lives to see you? And I think he did.

    C

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What Guys Said 10

  • sounds like he was honestly just exhausted - wait for him to get in contact about plans for next week before concluding that he's blowing you off. he might end up going away with work and so be unable to meet you for dinner, but if he's interested he'll suggest an alternative time instead. if he doesn't call, or calls to say he's going away with work so can't do dinner and makes no attempt (in that phone call or in the following week/fortnight) to meet up sometime else, he's probably decided you two aren't too well suited.

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  • I can see why you would think he's not interested, but he was also very tired. He may prefer to give you his full attention when he's on a date, and he can't do that if he's tired. Regardless, you asked him out for next week, so the ball is in his court now. Even if he has to travel, he should get back to you with a different day/time that would work for him. That's all contingent on him being interested in you; if he's not interested, he won't do any of that.

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  • Its not normal but getting up at 3:30 am isn't either.

    He could well have been really tired. SO I'd take it as neither a good nor bad sign and see how the next date goes.

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  • If he was up at 3,he really was tired...! But maybe it was the movie that bored him, not you...

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  • yes it sounds like you met a gentleman. This throws you off I see in a world of pigs and idiots. Relax and let him be himself. He is not blowing you off. He is not clingy. You may be, so if you can ratchet down a little and think slower for once then you might save yourself a lot of trouble. He is the man, not you. Remember?

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  • i really don't know. I can't possibly judge from that and probably no body else can either. the only one who can is you cause you have seen when he said it. but anyway give him a call next week if he did not answer or refused to go out then he probably doesn't want to go out with you again.

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  • Assume, for the moment, that he's 100% honest and a bit socially awkward but reserve final judgement until his next contact.

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  • Im not sure. I'm curious... How did you two meet? and how long did you know each other before dating?

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    • We met online and we talked for about a month before meeting in person.

    • is that becoming a common thing? like do you get nervous before that first date? id be terrified of seeing that person

  • He probably wanted to date you, and enjoyed the date. But he was up at 3am, he was probably trying not to fall asleep during the movie, so after, all he wanted to do is get home and sleep.

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  • put yourself in his shoes haha. up since 3 am, who knows how many energy drinks/coffees he's on. he's bouta crash

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What Girls Said 3

  • Take his word for it for now. It's not easy to make a judgment based on the little information we have right now. I advise you to wait and see how he behaves in the future. If he likes you, he'll continue to see you and talk to you, even if his work is tiring. If he doesn't, he'll keep making excuses and not go on any more dates with you.

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  • Normal given what time he was up. I use to have to be up at 4am for work, by 4pm I was exhausted. He'd been up a long time, so he would be wiped out.

    He's interested, he made a massive effort to be with you.

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  • I wouldn't worry too much. If he calls, great, if not, so what. It sounds like it was a good normal date. He was not disrespectful and he's taking things slow. WHICH IS GREAT! Don't hang out too much in the beginning. Make it a set date. Only dinner and a movie, nothing much more. It makes you both excited for the next date!

    Until you hear from him, just relax and enjoy the rest of the weekend/week. Consider it a blessing he didn't hang out following the date and try to hook up with you.

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