FWB/casual date being weird/distant. Discuss it or leave it?

[harveykinkle]

We're not in a relationship nor do I ever wish to be.

He's acting a bit odd. Do I bring it up or just leave it?

[Anonymous]

I had the same thing happen to me. I eventually asked him what his deal was. He was acting strange because he was convinced I was in love with him. He was doing/not doing things to make sure I knew he didn't care. Some men just think as soon as a girl is nice to them that they love them. I told him to go f*ck himself because there was nothing in it for me if there was no foreplay and he ignored me before and after sex. If I'm still in your bed you have to be civil, I'm not a prostitute. That still gets me angry.

[xyhic]

Always discuss it. Do not hurt the guys heart if he fell for you. Be firm and if he wants to be in your life tell him that's fine but it has to be appropriate. I hate when people just walk out of your life on a whim. Its cold heart and mean so tell him how you feel what you have noticed from him and then decide where the next course of action needs to be.

[MrMe2013]

That sort of happened to me.. Me and this girl were getting on great and then it was like she just disappeared... Went from constant contact to nothing and then started texting again saying how she still wanted to see me (but never did) and then eventually it was like she disappeared again, no contact, not even a "good luck on your exams" after I sent her a good luck message.. It was a horrible feeling how someone could just do that...

[Phoenix1991]

Not your boyfriend but if you two were decent friends to begin with, nothing is wrong with talking, but if it was all flirty from the beginning of this friendship, then its not your business to get involved.

So if he was a good friend before the benefits part, bring it up, IF not, leave it alone.

[HardAppleCider]

You've made your intentions clear?

If so, his feelings are "his" responsibility. You might try making sure your intentions are clear and asking him if this bothers him, but I wouldn't push any more than that.

[HardAppleCider]

You might actually borrow this line if it's needed:

"While I do care about how you feel, your feelings are your own responsibility."

That paints a clear picture for him as to what your expectations are and lets him know that, while you still care, that he is responsible for him. If he gets hurt, it honestly would be his own fault, especially after a straight forward explanation like that.

[Anonymous]

Well if you're not in a relationship then I don't think it's your responsibility to discuss it. Unless of course the reason he is acting a bit odd is because he is developing feelings for you.

[Anonymous]

Discuss it with him. Though that's too much stress since it's just casual.