A single mom dating a guy want to know when he should meet her son?

I am a single mother to. 3 year old little boy. I been dating this guy for 7 months. I was wondering do you guys know when is a good time to introdyce them. And if any other single moms or guys who dated single mothers who after they met the child did they connect at first or did it take some time. And how long should you give them to connect and give the boyfriend to love the child before you realized there never going to connect. My sons father is not in the pic I am not looking for a dad for him I just want to find a good guy to be around my son and a step dad.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • A good time to introduce them is just as soon as you start having the feelings that this guy is for real in your life. Like he's the one you'd like to have in your life as your husband. However, I assume you told him you had little boy a long time ago. That's absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. That's the way it is and you both go together. There are men out there that develop great feelings towards step-children to be, especially when they're that young. I admire your feelings and caring that you want to find a good guy to be around your son. That's so very important. I personally know a couple situations almost identical to yours. One involves a little girl and one a boy. In both cases they get along great but are now a little older than your little boy. They were introduced a little earlier than in your situation. I hope he knows you have a child. If not, that could come as a shock. If he already knows, I wonder why he hasn't asked to meet already. Unwed mothers are quite common as you should know. Just be proud of your boy and be anxious for the guy you've been dating to meet him. Some people just aren't good around children but most of them are. Those that aren't look at children as a nuisance and you certainly want to bypass a guy like that as soon as possible. But those that are welcome a family already started so that they can interact with the children the sooner the better. Unless your little boy is overly active or overly shy and your guy rather have a child-free relationship, they should get along well... as long as you've already told him you have a child. Otherwise it'll come as a big surprise. So the right time to introduce him in your situation is your very next possible opportunity in a nice setting. Make sure he's a caring and kind guy and one that's not selfish. It shouldn't take you long to find out how they connect. You should notice the guy wanting to play with him and interact with him, but it'll take a little longer for your son. Hopefully, that'll be by the second or third visit. I wish you the best of luck. :) If you ever have any further questions please let me know.

    jc-

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What Guys Said 2

  • The girl I'm seeing right now, still hasn't introduced me to her young children. I've met her eldest, who is an 18 year old girl. And she thinks I'm great.

    But I haven't met the young boy or the baby girl yet. And it's been 6 months. I'm not pushing things. She'll let me know when she's ready.

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  • You have kept him away from your son for 7 months? Wow! Good for you. Most moms I have dated introduces their kids to me right away. It can't be easy on the kids to see a new guy that might become their new dad that often.

    If you want a guy to love your child, then you need to see him as the child's father. Otherwise I don't understand how a step parent could love the step child, and be happy knowing that they will never be accepted as the child's true parent.

    If you don't want this guy to be a father to your son, then he doesn't need to love the child. He just needs to be responsible enough to help you by enforcing the rules you have made for your son. As long as they don't hate each other then that would be enough, for a step parent that isn't gong to act like a real parent.

    At least that's how I see it. If I get married to a woman with a kid then I WILL be treated as that child's father. I grew up with a step mom that didn't want to treat me like her son. That was not fun.

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    • I think as soon as you think you want this guy around permanently that it should be okay to introduce them to your kids. 7 months should be long enough for you to have decided on that. I have gotten along well with some kids right away and never gotten along with others. So it depends on how their personalities blend. Some real parents don't get along with some of their kids.

What Girls Said 1

  • tell him you have a son first and then when you feel you are steady and commited introduce them.

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