He refuses to TALK on the phone but still texts and flirts with me? Is he playing games?

Okay to make a long story short, we met online I'm 22 and he'll be 27 in November and we've been talking and messaging each other every so things were going pretty good. But a lot of times, we wouldn't catch each other on the website at the same time so we agreed to exchange numbers so we can text each other. He lives in the Bronx and I live in another state but I'm from NJ so even waaaay before I met him, I always tried to make plans to move back to NJ but now that I have a way to move back we agreed to meet each other once I move back.

Anyway we decided to talk on the phone for the very first time and conversation went well but ever since then, wouldn't call me anymore but would only have brief texting conversations and sometimes I would text him and he wouldn't respond. But when we do talk on the phone now, he's very quiet and and would say he has to call me back for some reason but will never return my calls but will text me little sweet messages in the morning (well sometimes and sometimes during the day) but will still call me "boo" or "sweetheart" and little names like that.

So is he playing games or is uninterested in me. Because in the beginning, he seemed to be very interested in me.

Should I tell him about it or just stop answering his texts?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Its important to let him know how you are feeling and then see how he reacts. If he's being shady then there is probably a reason. Maybe he's keeping something from you, maybe he's really shy, maybe he is playing games... whatever the reason you need to let him know.

    If it doesn't change then you know he isn't that serious and you should let him know you're not going to play games and stop replying.

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What Guys Said 5

  • sounds to me like he is either

    a) shy

    b) maybe embarassed to be talking on the phone to a girl he met on the internet if other people are around

    c) (what I think is most likely) is he is running games. Perhaps he's got a girlfriend or a wife and he doesn't want to be talking to a girl for fear that he other woman might overhear or check his call log or something. he can text you and then delete the texts so he can be shadier.

    In my opinion you should just ask why he doesn't talk on the phone much. Gauge his verbal and non-verbal response and see if you believe whatever he says. But it seems to me that there is something going on that he is trying to hide from you

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  • Sounds like he's living with someone which he is in some sort of relationship with. Its real easy to sneak a text out than it is to hold a verbal conversation. I think you need to try and find out more about him before investing any feelings into him.

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  • I'm gonna give you the straight forward answer: Stop answering his texts or respond in the way he is responding to you. Then he'll notice something different is up. He obviously doesn't think of you as one of his top priorities anymore. He might be hiding something, something that he's not telling you. The spark is slowly fading away.

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  • I am a man and say this with all honesty. If he only texts ladies be worried. Most likely cheating or up to no good...

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  • He's just playing with you

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What Girls Said 6

  • I honestly think that he is juggling. He likes you, but not in a girlfriend type of way, at least not at this present moment. Don't take him seriously, especially if he isn't responding back to your messages but yet, every so often, you're his boo. If I were you, I would just text him every so often when you're bored, and if he texts you, respond with a couple of words and don't reply back so soon. If I were you, I'd respond like the next day... lol...

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    • I agree with what she said. Treat others the way you want to be treated but right now doesn't apply to this case. If he's treating you like this then you should do the same.

  • Sound people just don't like talking on the phone, like me I fine with texting and messaging but talking to someone on the phone is just awkward no matter who they are... he might be the same. I wouldn't worry about it too much if its just phone calls he has issues with.

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  • Ever seen the show Catfish? I've seen way too much of it. He could be a lesbian using fake pics, or an old man, or have kids or something.

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  • he might have met somebody else but he is still having you as a back up plan

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  • either he is really shy or he is hiding something from you

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  • he is hiding stuff or hiding you from others.

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