My boyfriend is use to dating older girls, and I'm younger, how do I be more " mature" for him?

my boyfriends is use to dating girls who are older then him, I'm a year younger. he said he's use to more mature relationships. how can I make our relationship be more mature?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • lol... to me his statement is like he was saying he dates older (mature) women means that they would more likely give him sex more easily (more experienced in that area) than someone younger might.

    if he's dating you now and making those type statements to you about ex GF's he's hinting

    that if you want to be with him you've got to be more mature(sexual with him) than you are now.

    at 66 years of age I try to pull no punches here but give sound advice that is helpful for a good relationship.

    being mature isn't about being more sexual its about knowing who you are and being responsible for any decisions you make along the way in your life. a relationship can't be more mature only the people in the relationship can be mature.

    here's a good test if or what he believes a more mature relationship might be. ask him whaqt made these other girls more mature that made him like them.(also if they were so mature why isn't he still with them if it comes back about being sexual with him .>)

    i'm not trying to diss your boyfriend but trying to keep you from getting hurt by someone that may be not good for you in the long run.

    here is a website that answers the question as to what maturity is though of being...some are good others to be taken with a grain of salt.

    link



    hope some of this helps in your question here.

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What Guys Said 13

  • I don't think you should do anything in particular. He should accept you for who you are, and allow you to grow and mature at your own rate. I don't think maturity is something you can force on yourself.

    I think the best you can do is watch yourself and notice if you do or say things that seems immature. The act of noticing will help you grow naturally over time. Trying to force a change just becomes fake and will only change you on the surface without changing the real person inside. It should happen naturally at your own rate as you experience things in life.

    You need to be your own person, not someone he wants you to be. If he expects something else it just means he doesn't accept you for who you are.

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  • There's not really anything you can do except grow up like a normal person. I've definitely noticed that the younger girls I've dated don't really have anything they can teach me. They rely on me to hold their hand and take them step-by-step through life. It's great for them to have someone there to learn from, but then when I need a partner to help me through something, they aren't mature enough to handle that responsibility.

    It's an unavoidable part of being young, which I am too, but I've been through some circumstances that have forced me to mature a lot more quickly than other people my age. I relate more with 30 year olds than I do with other people in their early 20's.

    Of course, there are a lot of guys out there who are looking for a young girl for a trophy, and getting any sort of support doesn't matter. Personally I would rather have a partner to work through life together with, rather than a child I need to raise.

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  • You can't 'make' a relatioship be anything other than what it is. It's never good to 'act' a role.

    Enjoy being young; if he wants an older girl, then don't hang around with him for long.

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  • Don't be a drama queen is I think what he's getting at. I think a lot of younger girls tend to get upset quickly over stupid things or small things and cause a lot of drama. I talked to my ex recently after not seeing her for a few years and she said that she realized now she was really immature back then and got angry over things that shouldn't have mattered.

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  • did he say that so you could act more mature or so you know he might not respond to things most guys your age would. or did he say that to let you know he likes you in such a way that he's willing to date you even though you are outside the "norm" for his type of girl.

    if it's the last two I think changing could be a bad thing.

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  • you likes you for the way you are and that's why he's with you now. don't change a thing unless the girls he were dating were much older than him, there's not much of a difference from 18-24 in the way girls act.

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  • read more books I guess.

    dont talk as much

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  • Maturity and age are not always positively correlated.

    If you likes you, then so be it, don't question it.

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  • Just be yourself and know that trying to be more mature is a waste of time.

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  • Just be you

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  • just be yourself and don't worry about impressing him

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  • I guess the key differences that I can distinguish between older women and girls, Is girls are much more selfish, and only think about how life affects them and not their man. A woman thinks of everyone and is most of all sure of herself and knows what she wants.

    Girls also play lots of games,...like doing the whole "chase" thing, or play manipulative mind games in a desperate insecure way to control their man. Older women frankly don't have the time and see it as a waste of energy. Much more responsible too...

    Just some things to keep in mind, my experience.

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  • Try working on communication more, and understand that compromise doesn't mean you always getting your way. I wish I could find a girl that mature. :-P

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What Girls Said 4

  • Who says he wants a more "mature" relationship?

    Sometimes, the reason guys date younger is because they want someone who's still young, who's still filled with hope, filled with life, filled with energy and dreams and passion, and isn't all jaded and cynical and serious about everything.

    What makes you think he wants you to be "mature"?

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  • Maturity is not a behavioral pattern. You can't just practice it. It's choices you make when things become difficult.

    I know goofiest people who are very responsible and mature adults, and I know people who put on a serious, "powerful" facade, yet have mindsets of whiny children and expect the world to cater to them.

    If you just want to please your boyfriend, you should figure out whether maturity actually matters to him, or is he attracted to the facade.

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  • jsut make it an asset! show him that you being younger is not a bad thing!

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  • just be normal, try to talk about the issues instead of running away and accpet your mistakes.

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