Why is he so hot and cold?

So as I wrote in previous questions, I asked out the guy I like by text, and he completely ignored my message so I took that as a NO.

Now I was texting him last week and told him how I was going out that weekend to celebrate me getting my degree (I got a first, yay!) , and as soon as I said that he started asking me where I was going, who I was going with, etc, and saying how we should also go out to celebrate when we see each other. It's like he's suddenly interested in me again?

Could it be that he doesn't want me but doesn't like the idea of me going out with other people too? I don't know if that's a thing that guys actually do?

I don't actually want to be with him anymore because I'm fed up of him being so confusing, so I'm not sure how I should handle this?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think you should just ask him straight up whether he wants a relationship or not. Girls are often confused by our actions, but tbh the solution is ask straight questions. Congrats on your 1st btw! I only got a 2:1 grrr :p

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What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 6

  • Darling, When men are confusing, it is because they are confused!. They don´t know if they like you and want you, but at the same time they don´t want you to belong to anynody else

    ( ego...you know). If you initiate contact and do everything for him, why should he bother when he knows you´ll be there anyway?. Back off, don´t text him, don´t give him information. BELIEVE ME, if he likes you, he´ll pursue you. Id he doesn't. he won´t. Men get more interested as they invest in a woman, if he can´t invest in you because you do everything, he will lose interest if he has any. They like a challenge.

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  • Maybe tell him where you're going and with whom, but don't be too invitational.

    I know you probably feel confused with how he feels and are probably making excuses for him as to why he can't just straight up say that he's not into it or fess up with his feelings that it may seem like he has, but honestly I wouldn't waste my tiem with him.

    He's honestly up and down with how he feels because of either self confidence issues, has got another easier girl on the side, or other similar personal issues. Tell him where you'll be but I wouldn't contact or invite him anywhere anymore until he mans up and starts to reciprocate the interest himself.

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    • I didn't invite him though- he seemed to be trying to get me to invite him but I didn't, and I didn't respond to his suggestion of us going out to celebrate, do you think I did the right thing?

    • I know you didn't invite him, I was just saying to avoid inviting him, directly at least. I think you did the right thing because his mind is obviously not made up if he wants more with you or not, so keep your distance till he gives a clear indication of whether he's in or he's out. It'll really save you so much time stressing, over-analyzing different scenarios, and worrying about all of your actions towards him.

  • He probably just curious to whom you are going out with. Honestly, if a guy likes you he would often text you and ask you whether your free. A guy will not lose a chance to respond to a girl he likes when asked to be out. That's simple. People say ignoring the guy you like somehow tend to call them to want to chase him. Why don't you just lay off him and act like he's not important and that you are doing you.

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  • He doesn't want you in that way, but yet he doesn't want anyone else to have you.

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  • well get away fomr him and do your own thing.

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  • just stop talking to him, he should act that way

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