How will I ever make him pay?

dated my ex for 3yrs, he's a quiet likeable guy keep what goes on in his life on the low key and don't get close to people easily. come with a good christian family. so recently he accused me of cheating on him he was upset with me didn't talk for 2weeks. and then one Saturday evening he turned up at my house. he said he's sorry for not letting me explain things and the way he behaved it wasn't fair and he knows he trusts me. we patched things up and he came up with idea for our families to meet. I am very close to his family and he same with mine. but just a week before the meeting I discovered he's been in a relationship with a girl that was supposedly "his ex" all along. he dated her for 2yrs before me and since me and him started dating he never broke it off with her. its been going on all the time me and him were together. she is not even a girl she is a woman. am 22yrs old he's 24 and she must be mid or late 30's with 2children. I trusted him so much and I was shocked. I've been there for him he knows it supported him through difficult times. now this is how he pays me back. he took everything away from me. my confidence, my trust I feel like the biggest fool. and I want him to pay for what he's done to me. I want him to feel the pain he has caused me until I do this am not letting go he hurt me alot, way too much

Updates:
P.S this woman called me she said their relationship has been on and off for 5yrs and she know he loves her because every time they break up he's shows up at her house begging. and he even told her about something so personal to me I got pregnant during our relationship and lost the baby. she knew me and him was together when we first started dating but he told her afterward I was a one off fling he we not together.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • The classic two timer; one older woman, one younger...

    This is a 'good Christian?' More like the ultimate hypocrite, accusing YOU of cheating on HIM!

    As to revenge, remember what Confucius said: If you want to get revenge, first dig two graves..

    You have a life to live, you can't be wasting it on him. Getting revenge would be just as big a mistake as being with him in the first place.

    Learn one thing right away: guys like him aren't worth your attention, let alone all the effort it would take to get even. The worst thing you can do to him is ignore him. Be indifferent, don't let him make you resentful or angry, and don't take this out on other guys. That would be letting him win!

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    • he's a manipulative compulsive little liar. its true what they say about quiet people, they are like a green snake in green grass, you don't expect no harm from them. I seriously want to hurt him but this made me realize he's not worth it. and I am 100% sure he will regret this later and then he can roll in a hole die and rot in hell...

    • real talk the grass ain't greener on the other side they always come back

    • Good luck. Suzan. chin up, don't look back\1

What Guys Said 2

  • I know this is not what you want to hear, but you will either learn now or learn the hard way.

    Once you start hating someone or plotting how to get revenge on them, they own you. They own your emotions. They own your memories. They own your thoughts and your mind.

    There is even one punishment worse than receiving revenge. Being forgotten. Soon or eventually, the guilt will catch up to him and he'll punish himself. Let that natural process happen.

    As long as you let yourself be affected by him even as you separated from him, he will always win.

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    • yeh he will regret this I know it, because even though right now I feel like he's a stranger and I never really knew him, I know that he have a soft spot and I know his weaknesses.

  • I would just tell everyone you know what a cheating idiot he is until you feel better and then get over it. Don't waste anymore of your time on the idiot. But for your own sake do not text it, post or write it anywhere because he could sue for deformation of character.

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    • yeh that's what I feel like doing telling everybody exactly what an ass he is. he even had the audacity to tell me to keep quiet about why we broke up, he was like please don't tell your mum or my family about this. cause my family and his family thinks the sun shines out of his backside. but I've told my mum what happened anyways. I figure it's best off to just get him outta my life for good and focus on my own life. am young so...and thank yoouuu :)

    • Honestly, a lot of guys do stuff like this and give the good ones a bad name. I would tell your mom and whoever else. He obviously doesn't respect you. If he asked you to keep it quiet it is because he is embarrassed about what despicable person he was to you and the other woman during all this. Most guys lie to get what they want and what is best for them. You are right you are young, don't let him waste anymore of your life, but I would say take sometime before dating for you to heal.

What Girls Said 5

  • I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better but his a jerk all I feel like doing is help you kick his ass real good . I have been in a similar situation before so take my advise he likes drama do yourself a fav don't get involved in their games you don't deserve it and what's happening is not fair I know its hard but make yourself strong and move on with your life there is a good man out there ready to love your even stronger that you can imagine .

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    • thank you but you know how that say goes "what don't kill you make you stronger" I have to go through this pain and then come out stronger from the other side. he's manipulated me, lied to me and took away my confidence (atleast that's how it feels like now) but knowing the fact that he's a little immature, manipulative compulsive liar kinda makes me think twice about being depressed. because I know being that kind of person won't lead him very far in life

  • he want his cake and eat it to you want to hurt him I understand your pain been there it's better to let it go or if you can't get caught bust his windows one day.wait aweek flatten all for but not literly nail small nails like 9 each into each tire the air will seep out slowly.you get him back in his pockets scratch up his paint .drop flour in his gas tank.but never let him know it was you

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    • I think your sick she can do all these things but it won't help the hurt she's going through If anything she needs to surround herself with positive people and discover who she really is.

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    • I wanted to do worse than believe me, I was gonna get people to beat him up but I thot he's not worth it. like Martyfellow said, he will be winning if I let my emotions run wild. but am sure he will look back and regret it and that will be my punishment to him

    • that's true I'm mad at mine too just let the pain flow you gotta win to lose

  • dont do it

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  • dont do anything, karma will make him pay

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  • I wouldn't seek revenge, karma will make them pay

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