Do you believe that late bloomers have a harder time dating

I see my friends dating and it seems so easy for them

They meet a guy, they get into a relationship and it goes on for years but these girls have been dating since 13, 14, 15

Me another one of my friends started dating at age 19-20 there about and our relationships don't even make it to a year. I must admit most of us were bookworms in high school. Nevertheless, we are attractive and land guys its the keeping them that is the problem

Or are we selecting the wrong type of guys

So do you think dating early puts you at advantage?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • For guys, experience makes a difference because it allows a guy to build up his techniques and confidence.

    For girls, experience doesn't make much of a difference, because you don't do the approaches. If you're in a relationship with a guy, follow these basic guidelines. Support him in his career and interests. Don't push and push for ever more commitment. Be totally honest and open in your feelings. Don't get angry except in situations that truly justify anger. Don't withhold sex. Make him feel loved and cared for. Don't let yourself go. If you're doing all these things, then yes it's the guy's problem, and you need to meet different guys.

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What Guys Said 6

  • I think it gives you "practice" in dating, and might give you insights, but I don't know if it's specifically related to success level.

    Success level is arbitrary. I had a few cases where friends dated each other for over a year (many dating for several years); They went through the "dating phases," and they weren't attracted to each other. There weren't any feelings of genuine love. It was "A friend love" or "A Christian love" but as far as romance, nothing. I don't call dating JUST for "something to do" or "bragging rights" isn't a sign of success.

    Sometimes if you date earlier, you can get into unhealthy patterns (not always, but sometimes). I had several friends who slept with guys at the age of 11 or 12 because the girl thought it'd make her more popular; or she'd think she was in love with "her boyfriend of the week." Many of them are still in patterns of sleeping with guys within 2 weeks of dating; then they get treated badly; the guy suddenly stops calling; he moves on to the next girl; and she's stuck with the emotions and starts dating someone else as a kind of band-aid. Some have been doing that for 20 years.

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  • I don't think so at all...the main difference is that instead of dating and making your own mistakes and "victories", you were able to observe other ppl's dating habits with a clear head to learn from their example.

    So no, "late bloomers" IMO aren't at a disadvantage. :)

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  • I agree with what the first anonymous guy said, basically, guys have to literally know how to get a girlfriend, but girls don't need to know how to get a boyfriend because they don't have to do anything in order to make a relationship happen

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  • There are lots of reasons this can happen. A later bloomer hasn't had time to explore her own preferences - you probably forget your friends' earlier experiences with guy-of-the-week. Or, maybe part of blooming early is putting out more so they're ... physically active ... more than the later bloomers.

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  • Just be yourself!

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  • Unattractive guys are hated by women

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What Girls Said 8

  • I began dating at the age of 18. I still haven't learned as much as those who have been dating since they were 12/13.. however, after a few years, I can tell when a guy is full of BS and I can tell when a guy is being sincere. It takes time.. the ones who dated early just had more time to figure it out than we do, but don't worry.. we learn too, but because we're older, we also learn much more and grow much more in the progress - this is our plus point. =) I hope this helped!

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  • I kind of feel like it does. Most of my friends who started dating really young are married with kids, and here I am in a relationship (if that's even what it is), and am not happy.

    I just find that every relationship I get into, the guy seems like he's really interested, but then as soon as he has me, it's up to me to carry the relationship, and I AM TIRED!

    But they were able to find amazing guys who had babies with them young AND STAYED! These guys treat them like gold! They are so lucky to have that!

    I treat my guys like gold, but I don't really get much in return. I'm not a girl who friend-zones guys either, I barely have friends :( As most of my friends are all in the women with children clique, I only have my career and had to move away to get a job. So I'm kind of a lone wolf. I don't know anyone my age that has a career.

    It's hard for us singletons out there. I feel like my late bloomer status has put me at a disadvantage.

    I'm turning 24 this year and I'm not in any type of substantial relationship. I'm lucky if the guy doesn't get bored and go after someone younger at this point. It's really frustrating.

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  • I started dating my boyfriend when I was 21. He is my first boyfriend, and I've never been on a date with anyone else. Also, he was 23 and I was his first girlfriend.

    Personally, I think all that time alone puts me in an advantage in the dating game. I took that time to figure out who I was, and what I wanted out of life before finding someone with similar goals. I guess I see an advantage in the quality over the quantity of guys I've dated. Nobody knows who they are when they're 13, 14, or 15. So people who start dating then have to build their identity around their partners and then surprise, when it ends they lose their entire identity and feel the need to rush right into a relationship again because they fell like the only way they can be a complete person is when they have a boyfriend/girlfriend.

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  • I think it does, yeah. For one to distinguish between players and serious guys. Then you need experience in order not to mess up with some guy you really like. Been there once, worse crash ever.

    But I bloomed, if I can even say I did already, much later than 20 yo =/

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    • yh truth about players but I always wanted to date when I was through with college and independent of my parents

    • Yeah, me too. Nothing wrong with that I suppose =)

      On the other hand, think a "grownup love" is really different from a teenager's love. I'm not even talking about sex and stuff, but how it seems much lighter somehow, things seem to last forever... not in the adult world where many people seem to break-up and start a new relationship in a heart beat, juggle work and other more serious responsibilities. I guess some people in high school as well, but it's different somehow.

    • truth about grown up love people stick for less sh*t

  • Im a late bloomer and well I think that even if I'm a girl I would defiitely want more experience

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  • yes, I do

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  • yes, I do

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  • I agree, but for me its a different reason. I'm just now starting to get into that whole world, and I still feel kind of awkward about it since I was never the one sought out. It may be your picks that are just not good. I see the correlation between it being easier for one or the other, but I don't see the correlation between keeping them and not. That stuff varies a lot between what kind of guys you pick, hence lasting or not. Anyways, I wouldn't worry too much about it.

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