gaining confidence when it comes to dating

I'm 22 years old never had a girlfriend, been on a date etc, how do I gain the courage/confidence to approach a a girl? I'm not good at starting conversations either due to my shyness, advice would be greatly appreciated.


0|0
6|6

Most Helpful Guy

What Girls Said 6

  • i was like the most shy person ever until I got a job as a cashier when I was 20...i had to talk to all kinds of people all day long...that helped the most. I kind of practiced striking up conversations with guys in my line and it helped me have the confidence to do it other places outside of work.

    best advice I'd give is to just be friendly. ask questions. one time I got a number from a guy at the grocery store I was sure would never give me the time of day. we were both on the baking aisle and I just asked what size he thought this pan was that wasn't labeled. I knew exactly what size it was, but just played like I couldn't tell. then he asked what I was making and we had a little conversation and he gave me his number. so also be aware of girls who are trying to interact with you. don't assume any girl that talks to you is interested but always act interested just to be safe.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I would say just put yourself out there. Make yourself walk up to a girl. The more you do it and you get good reactions from it, the easier it should get [: I am a terrible conversation starter lol So I usually would end up blurting out random things -.- But just be yourself [:

    0|0
    0|0
  • Shyness is not an easy thing to overcome but I overcame mine when I gained confidence. I gained confidence by sticking my neck further out there. Just be natural don't lie about yourself for one that is the worst to start any sort of relationship with lies. I also found that taking self esteem workshops helped me with my social anxiety and shyness also.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I am turning 19 and also never been on a date or been ask out by a guy and I am to shy to start a conversation with one because it seems every time I do they seem like they don't want to talk or they are like why the hell is this person talking to me. So I have decided I would let the guy make the first move.

    0|0
    0|0
  • just be bold get som seconds of bravery and say hi to a girl

    0|0
    0|1
  • You will Always get uncomfortable and have doubts you just have to learn to overcomenthem.

    0|0
    0|1

What Guys Said 5

  • I recommend not comparing yourself to other men at all. Focus on what your good traits that your family likes about you and project it towards the women you will date and will become your first girlfriend. Do not pretend to be someone you are not. When you talk, keep it formal and casual. Do not give compliments as much for that is an annoyance - stick to complimenting on a good smile if one exist.

    Good Luck

    -Nicholas Halden

    0|0
    0|0
  • just drink...alcohol helps you to become less shy.

    0|3
    0|2
  • Strange enough I realized that when I am with a large group of people mixed with both boys and girls (girls I don't find attractive). I become comfortable and act as myself.

    Well the girls I have no attraction for usually digs me. And finds me more interesting than the others when I behave normal.

    However the girls I do find interest in have no interest in me because I become nervous and bashful. And have no confidence in myself to believing that I have a chance with her.

    What I do is pick out 2 girls. Clearly I'll fall in a crush with the one I find more interesting but I would then use that against myself to try to pick up the 2nd interesting girl.

    -It may seem confusing but I use this strategy against who I am. Nobody can control their emotions for people. So I settle for what I can and try to build a relationship with it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Hey man, I'm in a similar boat as you. I was in a long term relationship but that ended 9 months ago. I've realized after not having to pursue anyone for a long time, I've become shy around single females. I have been FORCING myself to try to talk to them. It's so painstakingly hard when you're shy. All you can do is FORCE yourself to talk to them. What I've read works is to spark conversation with strangers in stores and that type of thing. Supposedly if you do it enough, it becomes second nature. I'm not there yet...

    0|0
    0|0
  • you dont. what you do is just exist quietly as you normally would and build a repoire via activities. people will become interested in you and you will with them as well. think of it this way I guess you have friends right? right. well that's because people just naturally without thinking about it begin the process. the more you focus on it the greater your odds of failure.

    1|2
    0|1
    • i tried that for 5 years, and still no girl liked me

    • you arnt the norm.

Loading...