Are you girls like this with texting?

All my friends who are girls say it's up to the guy to text first. So basically if I don't text or call them then we won't talk. And I'm just thinking "we're friends but you aren't willing to text me?" I get a little upset by it. It's one thing if I'm trying to date them but I'm not, and I get upset that my friends are unwilling to start a conversation with me.

Do you girls do this too?


1|0
21|3

Most Helpful Girl

  • In my experience my male friends don't text as frequently as my female friends do. Which leads me to believe they're busy and I feel like I'm bugging them if I text them first (sometimes, other times I don't care). The major issue with us females is we don't wanna be annoying to men therefore, the best way to be less annoying is to just wait for them to decide they wanna talk to us.

    This though changes based on how close I am personally with the male. If it's one of my really close male friends I'll annoy the heck out of them and not care. Usually I'm more hesitant to text a guy first if it's someone I'm attracted to or like just out of the fear of coming off clingy so that might be something to take into consideration.

    I have one particular male friend who tend to have a fluctuating friendship with me. One month we're buddies the next there's a lot of flirtation and basis for a possible relationship. Whether or not I text them first is based on where our friendship stands. If he comes off friendly and kids around with me then I have no problem starting up a convo (probs because there's no tension and stress of what might happen) if he's flirty then... yeah I'm waiting for him.

    1|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 20

  • for every few messages he intiates I will. its just how to tell you're putting in the effort. I don't count texts as real communication. I only really value phone calls and face to face meetings. it may seem childish but there are plenty of guys who can text me, along with 100 other women. it doesn't take much effort is what I'm saying so I don't worry about texting him first. I show people I'm interested when I answer the call and agree to dates. I don't have to text you every day, if I like you I will like you no matter what, your job is to show me that you take this seriously. its just a way to see who is trying the hardest. the best man will win. there are certain situations where texting is more convenient and has to be done more...but most of the time I'd rather not be convenient to keep around. Easy-going, but not convenient. now later on when we are committed to one another I text way more, but in the beginning its all about putting effort in.

    0|0
    0|0
  • No, if I want to talk to someone I call or text them. However if I'm always initiating contact with someone I take it that they aren't that interested in keeping in touch with me. So I'll take the hint and stop contacting them.

    1|0
    1|2
  • If it's a random guy that gets my number, I usually would leave it to him to text me first. I mean, if I asked for the number, I'd typically text first. Now if it's an actual guy friend that I talk to often/hang out with, I'd text them first. Not really because I'm not willing to text, it just doesn't cross my mind. But I do believe that this is common for girls. I think the main reason is because they want to feel like they want to feel like you want to talk to them and that you're thinking of them. Or if you're someone they like, they don't want to annoy you. But if it's just as friends, there should definitely be no problem on the female's side to start conversations.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Not with friends, but with dates, yes. In the beginning of a relationship, he can text and call me, or we don't speak.

    Friends, though, are different. I'm usually the one carrying the weight with friends.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Nope, I text first all the time. My guy friends always reply, but they don't initiate very much unless it's to confirm time, place to meet up or something >___>

    0|0
    0|0
  • Not purposely but I like it when a guy initiates to contact me first. I don't wanna seem needy or clingy or bored and desperate.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Not really, I don't wanna be starting convos more than him cause I don't wanna annoy him, but as long as we are equal OR he does it more often than me then I'm good.

    0|0
    0|0
  • with a boy I like, I usually wait to hear from him. I want a guy who wants me...I don't like being the pursuer unless its just for sex. But if its a dude friend I have no problem texting.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yeah a lot of girls do. Like I have to text first most the time but if you never do I t back I won't text you...

    0|0
    0|0
  • no that's retarded. especially if you're dating. its never up to one person. its just bratty to expect that. imo.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I may do that for the first couple of dates and then I start to initiate more. But if after a while I find myself as the one texting all the time then I completely back off. It's all about balance

    0|0
    0|0
  • If it is one of my guy friends I text them first normally but its a different story when its a guy who I'm interested in. I wait for those guys to text me and if they don't then I text them. But girls can text guy friends first its not like there is some rule they are breaking. They probably expect all guys to make the first move in communication

    0|0
    0|0
  • I don't do this, no.

    I don't focus on who texts who first. I usually don't even notice, I just text when I feel like it, when I feel like saying hi.

    If, AFTER we've been friends for a while, I start to notice someone has bad texting manners (delayed responses, no response), I'll stop texting them. I'll respond but won't initiate anymore. I have quite a few friends who never say goodnight or goodbye, they just stop responding, basically ignoring me. That gets very annoying and I'll eventually stop initiating conversations with people like that. I understand people get caught up in life or fall asleep and what not, but EVERY texting cconversation? No. Haha!

    0|0
    0|0
  • just text her if you like her, I don't think about it too much.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes, a lot of girls do. I actually initiate the convo sometimes if they don't and I think they're interested. If I see I always do I give it a break for a while and if they're interested they'll come around.

    0|0
    0|0
  • " So basically if I don't text or call them then we won't talk."... yes. I know its lame, but it is a girl thing.. But if me and a guy was JUST friends I would call him (even send him bunch of random messages), but if it comes to dating. I would wait for him to call or text first.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Show All
    • So if you're "just friends" you'll call or text but if you're dating you'll ignore him if he waits to see if you'll text? You must have put away a lot of guys overtime. You can't have a "mutual attraction" if you insist on turning it one-sided.

    • Haha, no.. I don't think you guys understand what I am saying. Let me explain :) When it comes to dating I think both parts need to take care on when to call or text (It takes two to tango), but if it was a new guy I was dating I would let him text or call me first even if I really liked him (I don't want to look needy). . I don't get why I am being called out when it is a lot of girls feeling this way :)

  • It seems a little silly that if a girl is just friends with a guy, she won't text him first. You're just friends...what does it matter? If I like a guy or am interested in him though, I don't text first as much as I would if we were just friends. I'm afraid of coming on too strong.

    1|0
    0|0
  • nope

    0|0
    0|0
  • no that's dumb I wouldn't do that.

    0|0
    0|0
  • yes, sometimes, when I don't know the guy much

    1|0
    0|0
    • The friends I'm thinking of I've known for over 5 years now.

What Guys Said 3

  • Yes a lot of girls are like this.

    If she never initiates, don't waste your time on her because she's going to be the same way in a relationship too. It's very disappointing as I have come across many of these types. Focus on the quality of the girl and if she's not one to have enough compassion to even ask how you are doing, she's a waste of time. The girls who say "the guy has to text first or we don't speak" do not have what it takes to be in a relationship and are mostly the ones who has self-entitlement issues. She needs to care about you the same way you care about her for things to work.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Its not too hard to text first. All you got to do is say something witty without talking about poop or any gross bodily functions.

    The first conversation is pretty easy in at first if the girl really likes you.

    But as time go's on, that's when it gets challenging.

    All you gotta do is don't be to anticipated and just be the guy that she admired in the beginning but at the same time progress with positive success as being yourself.

    Be the best positive qualities of you and focus on your strongpoints.

    And call her as well. Don't just text.

    Calling her during arguments or during stressful moments is probably the best because then your words won't be misunderstood.

    Also, don't overwrite in texts As well

    0|1
    0|0
  • They like it as well

    1|0
    0|0
Loading...