I've tried meeting girls in bars and clubs with no success, I get violent aggressive responses more often than I even get a number. I've tried online, I can barely even get replies let alone dates. None of my female friends ever introduce me to girls and all of them have boyfriends. None of my male friends are in a better situation than me, in fact most of them are still virgins and don't know any girls. All the women at work are 30+ and most of them have kids. Anyone got anywhere else I should look or anything else I can try?
Or should I just give up until I can afford plastic surgery, then take some steroids to get a good body and try again after that?
I'm just worried I'll spend years depressed while earning money to get surgery, damage my health with steroids and then still be hopelessly alone. Is dating supposed to be this difficult?
I'm not asking for a supermodel, any girl who isn't obese will do.
Most Helpful Girl
I think you need to ask yourself a few questions:
-Say you get plastic surgery and take steroids until you get a "good body"--What more do you have to offer?
You seem to have a misunderstanding of what chemistry entails. YES, women and men have preferences. YES, women and men have standards. YES, women and men are all individuals and you cannot generalize individuals.
You have this idea in your mind that women only like a certain type of guy. Which leads me to my next question:
-Why do you want to please "girls" and "women"? Why would you rather attempt to please an entire group of women instead of waiting until a woman who likes and prefers you the way you are comes along? Since when are all women the same? Since when do we all like he same things?
Is that a hint of sexism I sense? Because women aren't exactly fond of a sexist attitude.
-Now I must ask, after the surgery and steroids, what else would you have to offer? This is where your misunderstanding of how relationships begin comes into play.
Dating is mutual; relationships are mutual.
Man sees woman>>>Man finds woman attractive>>>woman sees man>>>woman finds man attractive>>>Man and woman make eye contact>>>Woman/Man proceeds to introduce him/herself>>>Woman and man proceed in conversation and discover mutual interests and likes>>>Woman/Man asks woman/man on date>>>Man finds woman attractive and enjoys being in her presence>>>Woman finds man attractive and enjoys being in his presence>>>Woman and man enjoy date>>>Woman and man continue to go on multiple dates>>>Woman and man become official couple
Now, this scenario is not set in stone and I'm not setting any particular guidelines for who should approach or ask out or initiate an exclusive relationship.
You add in "I'm not asking for a supermodel, any girl who isn't obese will do." which leads me to believe you misunderstand that at some point within introduction or date, compatibility is determined.
If two people love the way they look but can't stand being the presence of one another, they're not going to date let alone end up in a relationship together.
You need to focus on YOU because there are a lot of issues that can't be resolved by asking questions on here. You need to work on your self esteem and confidence.
Then re-evaluate your approach and how exactly you're going about showing interest in women.
Of course, finding hobbies or joining a local club is always an option.
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