I am dieing for a boyfriend. Why is it so hard for me to find a guy?

I have been single for almost three years now and am getting very upset about it. All my friends are getting married and having babies and I can't even have a boyfriend who I like. I am ready to fall in love its something I have never felt before. I am on four different dating sites and have been on them for a while and I go on many first dates but never second ones. What do I have too do? Why do I have to be single at 24?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • We don't know what you're doing wrong, or how you are putting off men. And I highly doubt you'd be able to pick out any of the negative qualities you possess or any inappropriate behaviors that you engage in on dates.

    The problem with you could be anything from, starting incorporate conversations on the first date, to even having a social disorder that you are not aware of.

    Best thing to do would be to ask the guys who rejected you. Simply say "hey I don't know if you remember me, I'm *insert name here* we went on a date a while ago. I've realized that I'm not so good at dating, and I wonder if you could tell me of anything I did or said that made you not want to go on a second date with me. So that I can make improvements for my future."

    If men keep rejecting you, it is safe to say that it is something you are doing.

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    • Ya I'm not sure how to fix whatever I am doing wrong.

What Guys Said 2

  • if your putting that much energy into finding a boyfriend and can't get one the problem is YOU.

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    • Ya I know it sucks cause I wanted to have a fairytale lol I would love to be a wife but ide like to have a man who loves me too. Sounds like you may have had your heart broken is this true? I have been cheated on so I know how bad guys can be.

    • Yeah I have, its life and happens to just about everyone. You can still find love it's just that most people don't know what it is, it's not the stuff you see on tv, movies, disney, that is all crap they make up to sell stuff. The Greeks used to have one word that meant both love and friendship, friendship was viewed as the highest form of love and sexual intimacy between friends was considered normal. This romance ideal we have now is only a few hundred years old, the world is f***ed up now.

  • just be glad that being insecure about being single will not screw your chances as much as it will a guy

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    • Why do you say that can you explain?

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    • I try to hid it but I'm not sure if guys can see right through it.

    • Most guys overlook insecurity in a girl like that

What Girls Said 5

  • I hear you. I am in the same boat too..i am turning 24 at the end of the year and yeah although I'm not on dating sites. I have tried them in the past. I am above average looking and am in shape.

    The guys I attract only seem to want to "bang" me or flirt with me until they sleep with me. I have a hard time trusting people.

    Honestly don't rush it..itll happen in good time. for me I'm not even gonna bother looking for men because the good ones will come to you and stay for YOU.

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    • See I don't sleep with any guy for a couple of months of dating because then I can tell if he just wants sex or wants to be with me. I work with all women and spend most of my time at work so no one will be coming too me.

    • I know what you mean I'm like that too..its just upsetting when you are dating someone for a bit and find out that's what they want you feel like you've wasted your time...

      I don't know maybe go out to new spots at lunch or for walks downtown you never know who you will meet but then again all the guys I've gone out with I've met through friends or because we're in the same community (greek )

  • because you are too needy

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    • So I should just sleep with every guy who crosses my path that's called a slut!

    • Dont you know how to middle ground anything. You don't have to sleep with everbody

  • calm down, try to flirt with many guys and one fo them is going to ask you out, play by the numbers.

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    • I don't go after guys I was told and I still believe it that if a guy wants you he will make it happen. The guy will go after you and then you take it from there.

  • You've been on many first dates but never second ones? Is this a choice you make, or are the guys not willing? It's possible your standards are too high/disproportionate to what you offer, you're not giving guys a chance, etc. there are actually many possibilities, but I'd need more info. What's some basic stats about you? What kind of guy are you looking for? How do you feel these dates go?

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    • Its half and half sometimes I reject them and sometimes they never call me back. Usually the guys I really like I never hear from again and vice versa.

    • I can't really help you without knowing more, but going on second dates with the half that are interested is a good start.

  • Hey, I want to tell you that I am 22 and having the same issue. I am decent looking, but it is very hard to make things work right. If I were you I would talk about your interests and really get to know people. One date is not enough to get to know someone. You should allow more dates than that.

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    • Im glad that someone gets what I'm talking about. Read what the guy put above your comment, he didn't want to help he wanted to tell me that its my fault. I am picky but not that picky. Well the guy never asks me out on a second date so I just figure he didn't like me or something. I am not the type of girl to go after someone, I was told early on and I still very much believe that if a guy wants to date you he will make it happen. If he does not want to date you then he will not go after you.

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    • Hey, I can't find you on here. Could you add me and I'll send you a message when you send me the request.

    • sure.

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