Question about texting...

I have started seeing this guy who relies solely on texting as our way of communication outside of seeing each other face to face. He told me he finds texting awkward so I asked him why he texts me then and he said, "Because it's easier than talking to you on the phone". I honestly don't know whether to feel flattered that he's texting me much since he hates it or to be annoyed that he won't make the effort to call.

I'm not really that bothered about talking on the phone, but sometimes he will start a conversation via text and then disappear for the rest of the day which is quite annoying. I don't text him to see where he disappeared to though and the next morning I will get a text saying hello etc. The thing is that if he doesn't hear back from me within something like 4 hours I get another text asking if I'm OK.

I really don't get this. He disappears for hours and hours at times, even when I've asked a question and I usually never get an answer but if I don't reply then it's like he thinks something's wrong. Can any guys or girls out there make sense of this behavior at all? I try not to take his texting habits personally but we don't see each other often and I hate that I have to wait until I see him to feel close to him again.


Most Helpful Guy

  • That's just human nature actually. If a person seeks something they will pursue why they haven't gotten it. If a person is sought after they gauge the importance of things much differently. Think of it as being hungry versus being asked to make dinner.

    Why he wants to act like this is curious. You should simply call him forcing him to make that time. His consistent refusal combined with his lazy behaviors make him a bad investment. Weak communication early is a strong predictor for troubled communication later.

    • Thanks for your input, but isn't it possible that he just doesn't like talking on the phone or it's too early days for that? I haven't asked him to call me or told him I want him to so maybe he doesn't think he is doing anything wrong. Yes I would like better communication than just disappearing during a text conversation but it feels to early to be complaining...

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    • I appreciate everything you said, honestly. But I've had SO many different points of view on this. Some guys say they hate calling and will only do it if they have to but that has no basis on how they feel about the woman. So I'd rather figure it out using other things as the communication needs more investigation. Thank you for your input again.

    • Oh I completely suggest that. I mean the goal isn't to get you to obey me ( at least not overtly ) but instead to understand him ( at least covertly ) on my part. As I said what you asked is simple, but blind speculation is all I got, so it's a game for me, one of the process of elimination and SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY EXTRACTING INFORMA ...

      Yes, thank you, goodbye.


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What Guys Said 1

  • i do the same thing

    • Ok so why is that? Why do you leave the girl hanging but then ask if she's OK if she does the same to you?

What Girls Said 3

  • i don't think he does it on purpose actually.

  • i don't find guys really good at communicating in general. They don't tell you what you need to know.

    • No that's true. They tend to just leave you hanging and wondering what's actually happening!

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    • I have no idea. He says he hates texting but doesn't call either. I've only known him a few weeks. He's different to other guys I've dated so I really can't say!

    • oh that's not very long. You'll just have to live with it and see how this relationship progresses.

  • that is just how guys text