Guys: if a girl gave it up too fast, one-night-stand style, would you ever make her your gf?

I started talking to a guy last Sunday and we hung out for the first time the following Saturday. We were texting for a few days, getting to know each other and suddenly (idk why, don't ask) I decided I wanted to just hookup on the weekend. I told him I wanted to have a one time hookup with him and he said he was fine with that. He came over for like half an hour and we just had sex (after like five minutes of obligatory talking). He left right after because I told him we only had an hour max before my roommate came over. We hugged goodbye and I texted him sometime after saying if he wanted to hangout in a real way some other time, we can. He didn't respond, but two hours later at 1am he accepted my FB friend request I had sent long before. In the morning when I saw I still had no response, I said, "Or not lol" and it's been forever and he still hasn't responded. I know he's at work until 7, so that could be it...but still he had the morning before.

My main question is: are all bets off for turning this around somehow (assuming he texts me back) and making me somehow girlfriend material in his eyes? I don't know if giving into my hormones was the end all be all of this.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • In my experience (25 years of having people come to me for relationship advice), 9 out of 10 guys who wanted a relationship would no longer respect and trust a girl who gave up sex before being in a relationship, and would no longer see her as relationship material. For guys who didn't want a relationship, that number is even worse, with nearly 10 out of 10 guys not respecting her as "girlfriend material". While that does leave some room for exceptions, the odds are very much against you.

    ONS and FWB are fine if you want that and never, EVER expect to have a relationship with that guy, but if you think you might ever want a relationship with a guy, you simply MUST wait for sex until you get the relationship.

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What Guys Said 13

  • Guys: if a girl gave it up too fast, one-night-stand style, would you ever make her your gf?

    If I were single and dating, yes, I would potentially date a girl who had sex with me the first night. It might even be a plus, though everything else would still need to fall into place. I am aware that there are a significant group of guys out there where you would immediately be considered 'not girlfriend material'. If that's the case, there's not much you can do, unless it was the first time you ever had sex and you fell head over heels for him and tell him, and he happens to think you're amazing.

    "I told him I wanted to have a one time hookup"

    I'd assume you meant that.

    What do you actually want, and when did you decide this? You are telling us even now you wanted a one night hookup, now are asking if you can turn it around?

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    • Yes, exactly my question is if I can turn it around

    • I'm going to say no. If he was hoping for more he would probably have tried to keep things going. Sex CAN make men feel closer but not when they go into it 'pump and dump' more. By calling it a one night stand beforehand he turned any feelings off IF he had them

  • The circumstances would have to be extraordinary for me to continue to go out with her if she was so willing to give it up that quickly. That type of behavior can be a real red flag and I come from the old school values in relationships.

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  • He would have to really like her. But majority of the time a guy won't consider a girl who does one night stands or FWB to be girlfriend material, at least that's the case for the "good guys" aka the guys that most girls want. Guys who want relationships want the good girl, who hasent been used by every guy around, but they want her to be into sex just for him. In other words men want a lady in the street but a freak/slut in bed only for them.

    I'm sure he enjoyed the sex, but you giving it up that quickly has likely put him off from pursing anything further. He probably thinks you get around a lot so that lowers your worth to him

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  • You said you wanted a one time hook up, so that was basically it. The guys not gonna return your text. If a girl had a one night stand with me, I wouldn't call her girlfriend material. She's probably been around and I am sure that if she was my girlfriend, she wouldn't trustworthy.

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  • Most guys wouldn't. If they give up too soon, the guy doesn't go for them. You gotta make the guy WORK for it. Make him put in time and effort. Especially, make him date you first. If he won't date you because you won't give it up, he isn't worth your time.

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  • He could be playing it cool. Who knows. If a guy likes you and the sex is good, I don't see why he wouldn't have an open mind.

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  • Sure, why not?

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  • Lmao. Hell no! Never, ever, ever, ever.

    Ever.

    If she f***ed me on the first night, she definitely f***ed a bunch of other guys the first night too.

    They can be short-term fun.

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  • Yes, depending on how I feel comfortable with her.

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  • Maybe, if I was the only one she had given it up too fast for.

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  • If a guy wants you for more than sex, having sex with him early isn't going to turn him off. But whether a guy wants you for just sex or for more than sex, he will eventually leave if you don't have sex with him. My advice to a girl is, have sex when you want it. Holding out to make a point doesn't really solve anything.

    The shortest relationship I ever had lasted two months. She held out for one month before agreeing to have sex. I dumped her a month later.

    The longest relationship I've ever had is my current one. It's lasted two years so far. My current girlfriend and I had sex for the first time a week and a half after we first met.

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    • My current girlfriend and I had talked for like 5 or 6 hours in total before first having sex, only half of that time was face to face.

  • I'm answering the question in your title: OH HELL NO!

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  • Girl I have up my virginity to, was a one night stand, she had just broken up with her boyfriend and I was looking to prove something. Worst mistake of my life. I tried talking to her after it but we eventually stopped. She wasn't interested and neither was I, I was just having attachment issues (it's hard to let go of someone you just f***ed). Only time helps that

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What Girls Said 2

  • it dpeneds on what the guy is looking for, if he wants a relaitonship and the girl will keep on tlaking to him it can obviously happen.

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  • he won't want a relationship

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