Guy is freaking me out after 2 dates

I have been out on TWO DATES with a guy, okay, TWO DATES! He is already talking about our future together and how much he truly "insanely" likes me... tells me I'm a rare gem and that he wants us to move into a relationship etc. Now, he's a really nice guy, he compliments me all the time and opens doors for me, very sweet, but really I mean after two dates he's ready to take it to the next level?

For instance : After our first date I was talking about how nice it will be to graduate from college, move out of this city and up to one I've wanted to live in for forever, and get a good job in healthcare in a couple years, and his first question was "well will you wait for me to be promoted enough at my job to move with you? It may take about 4 - 5 years but it WILL happen I know it!" FIRST DATE!

He gets jealous so quickly that all I have to do is just MENTION a man's name and it's "who is that? Well how do you know him? Why does he have your number?" etc... meanwhile all of these guys are people I've known for a long time from school. Several of which are currently overseas and a few are gay so what's the BFD? They're my friends end of story!

I asked him yesterday if he'd be okay with us just being friends IF a relationship didn't work out between us, and he freaked out... called over and over telling me how he felt sick to his stomach over that question and that he was worried about losing me ... said he only got a couple hours of sleep because I'm "just out of his reach and he wants me so badly" etc... I just don't know what on earth to do... does anyone out there know what's going on?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He's doing the standard thing that many guys do in their first relationship.

    If you're like 95% of the girls out there, you'll dump him for being a super-clingy weirdo, and he'll learn his lesson the hard way.

    If you're in the other 5% you'll explain why he's acting weird, that his feelings are not real, and then if he learns his lesson, have a normal time dating him. Or if he doesn't learn his lesson, dump him.

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What Guys Said 11

  • This guy is the same type of personality as me, only he has less experience with girls. He probably likes you a lot, but probably as much as you like him. He just doesn't know how deep feelings can get because he probably hasn't been with many girls. I am guessing by the way he is acting he is still a virgin and has been single for a while. Just tell him that it will take time to see if your two will be able to date and for him to tone it down. If he keeps up this whole over-the-top act after you tell him to tone it down, then you should leave. Just don't mistake inexperience with insanity. Give the nice guys a chance, they end up as really good boyfriends in the long run.

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  • I think he is genuine .. but he is inexperienced... if you think he could be someone (on the long run ) that you would like to be with then you could teach him a bit .. but if you don't really feel special for him then tell him that he overwhelmed you and you can't continue. If you decide to dump him.. then do him a favor and tell him why so that he learns.

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  • as a guy I've had feelings like this for girls before , its does happen where you meet someone and just sort of fall for them really soon and really hard . it can be hard to deal with these feelings as a guy I've had them before and when your not actually seriously dating the girl it can be tough to know what to do and usually I end up getting hurt in the end

    I guess you sort of have to determine if this guy either really likes you or just really wants a relationship , if he really likes you maybe its worth dating him a bit more to see where it goes . if he just really wants a relationship with a girl it might not be worth your time . but I guess its up to you if you think he's someone you'd like to be with

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    • Lol at all those guys saying that is normal behavior for your first relationship, because it is not. Run away!

    • well yeah his behavior is a bit off , I was just saying I've had feelings like his for girls I didn't know very well yet and it can be hard to know how to deal with them . without freaking the girl out

  • run! and don't look back! lol

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  • He is definitely inexperienced and has given you all the power, most girls will dump him but if you can work on him and don't freak out it seems like he will be a very nice guy but it's really up to you and how much you can deal with it

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  • I say just tell him to step on the brakes... it's possible you've got a great man in your midst ;)

    Don't let his fast-paced nature scare you off!

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  • You need to break up. He's insecure and can't handle a relationship with a girl right now.

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    • I think there might be some truth in this, or he's desperate to be in a relationship.

  • Desperate and inexperiened

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  • It's nice to give him a second chance, however it's not going to get better.

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  • Run really f***ing fast.

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  • Be more open with him, reciprocate more if you want things to work out. If you give him less things to worry about, he should calm down.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Things are going too fast from his part , it could be real and he is falling for you too quickly or just he is confused and can't recognize his feelings or just playing you around to make you fall for him but anyway it all depends on you ,first see if his feelings are true or not and don't rush yourself , when they are ,ask yourself this question : Do you like him enough to stay with him ? if so give him a chance , he seems a really nice guy so he will treat you right ? what more can a girl ask ? ;)

    if his feelings are not real then it is better to avoid this relationship .

    I've been on a relationship with a guy like this ,who fell for me too soon and said he loved me from the first week after we met ! at first I didn't believe him but he treated me so right that I found it hard to not accept to date him (though I didn't like him) I kept on telling myself maybe I would end up feeling sthg for him but never did because I wasn't even into him :/ I wish I was because he was so nice and all but these things you can't control and I think that hurt him a lot and I found myself in a bad position feeling guilty :/.. I'm telling you this to avoid any heartbreak.

    Hope I helped you :)

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  • it could go like this link or he's just inexperienced and he'll just learn his lesson-if that's the case,for his sake,you should dump him-he needs the experience.

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  • Dude, that seriously has happened to me a couple times omg! It literally is the creepiest and scariest feeling! I felt like it was such a responsiblity and just like a this uncomfortable expectation and pressure, that just got me wanting to drop off the face off the earth. Even when I didn't respond for a couple of days its like the whole world was ending. Yeah honestly, it's getting obsessive fast or compulsive, I'd be worried just because he is investing heavily so quickly. You're perfectly right to feel creeped out in this situation it's not a healthy one! I'd try to find a way out of it, but just focusing on some aspect of your life that has just came up that is most important than anything; family, loved ones, career, health, ect.

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