Who should drive to see who in the relationship?

Lets say you been dating a guy for a month now, hr lives

40 minutes away from you. You guys have been on 3 dates

He drove 40 minutes to see you...

But this time he wants you to drive by his house to see him...

I feel like I shouldn't have to drive late on the highway to see him,

When we are not even official yet. Plus the fact that we are going to be

By his apartment is turning me off, I don't want him to think he could

Take me home and f*** me... so I simply said No!

With all honesty what do you guys think? Am I wrong or is he ?

Updates:
Guys he is NOT my boyfriend. ... we are just dating (talking) etc

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Lol what the hell? So, you're telling me you don't want to drive to meetup with a guy you've been seeing, but you want him to take time out his life to. Wasting time, effort, and gas money? That doesn't make sense to me. He nor you are in a relationship, but he's still attempting to make things work if he's coming so far away and you guys are only dating. If you don't feel the need to make a 40 minute drive to see him, then neither should he, it would only make sense. Seems like he's putting in more work than you.

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What Guys Said 3

  • If driving in the dark makes you nervous than make sure to tell him that.

    A relationship is about compromise, both parties should be willing and wanting to please the other party. The conversation should be more like, no sweet heart you don't have to drive, I'll come up there, No baby you don't have to do that I'll drive down. If its not, the real spark may just not be there. What I find myself willing to do, and how I talk to another person is a sign to myself how I really feel about them. If you don't feel that way about him than that's fine your not married, millions of fish in the sea.

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  • 50/50.

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  • Relationships are about compromise. So when you live that far apart, both parties should make an effort to drive to see each other.

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What Girls Said 4

  • I think you should get your lazy complaining ass in the car and get on the f***ing high way and drive to see your man. Once there, you can either get off your entitled high horse and enjoy the time with your guy or you can dump him.

    Heaven forbid he want a relationship that is 50/50.

    Who says you'd have sex anyway? Does it not take two to do that?

    You're dead wrong. I'd dump you if I were him. Just saying.

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  • I don't see the harm in going to see him since he drove out for you. Plus, it's been a month.. Not like it's 1-2 weeks.

    Being by his apartment doesn't mean he wants to get it in. Let him know that ahead of time and/or don't let it get that far. You're thinking that's what he wants.. When you aren't sure. Try communicating, eh..

    Frankly, I don't think you're being fair here. It's a two way street.

    Drive out to him early in the day or come to a compromise.

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  • So you're trying to avoid seeing your boyfriend because you think he wants to sleep with you? Haha! Okaaaaaay...

    You're not being fair. He drove out last time, it's your turn. That's how it works. And 40 minutes is NOTHING. I've driven much longer than that to see my boyfriends before. If you're not willing to make that VERY small sacrifice, maybe you shouldn't be in this kind of relationship. You're making a mountain out of a molehill. And thinking he should always have to drive to see you but you shouldn't ever have to drive to see him? Ugh, women.

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  • The guy I'm seeing is 2 hours away. First time, we met half way, each drove an hour. Second time, I went to his place. Doesn't bother me, I prefer it, that way I can leave whenever. However I'm used to long distance, my best friend is 4 hours away. We'll drive 2 hours to the closest bar on any given Saturday night.

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    • Thats so cute

    • Welcome to the rural part of the country. Driving an hour anywhere is normal, I can't even go shopping in any place closer than an hour.

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