Am I being obsessive or desperate?

So I met this girl on a dating site, I thought she was cute so I sent here a message that was completely respectful and such, when she responded it was about 2 weeks later that we met in person, we went to see monsters university after that I invited her over my place to hang out, by the way I am 19, a virgin, and I still live with my parents, and we sat on my back deck talking for a few hours and I felt that we have a strong connection but I am also so terrified of screwing this up cause I want to be in a relationship with her. I prefer girls give me some advice since they may be able to give me better advice, but how do I show her that I am interested in her without coming off as desperate or obsessive?


Most Helpful Girl

  • You try to have the same confidence you would if you were speaking to a girl that is just a friend. I've noticed that about myself (when I was single). I am a fun outgoing person who loves to meet new people. If I don't have a romantic interest in you, you get to see my whole personality. If I do have an interest in you, I get shy, concerned I'll say something wrong, etc. The thing is, if that other person IS the right person, then they aren't going to think you are stupid for what you say. So, to not come off as obssessive or desperate, you give her a day or two after the date, tell her you had fun and you'd like to see her again and MAKE plans. No need to talk everyday, and no need to text everyday, just go with what feels right. If she's digging you, she's not going to be noticing 'mistakes' you think you make. She'll be just thrilled to be spending time with you and any little blunder will probably be seen as cute, rather than annoying or clingy.


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What Girls Said 1

  • just tell her you are interested in being in a relationship with her

    • Well I did let her know that then we agreed to take things slow.

    • Show All
    • thanks. I might tell you what happens

    • oh no, is a must do :) let me know asap

What Guys Said 3

  • If I can build off of the best answer. Just be yourself. It's such a cliche that nobody ever wants to hear but it's the best advice you can get. If she doesn't like the real you, than she isn't worth dating anyway. So just be casual, be friendly and enjoy spending time together. Don't put pressure on yourself to impress her because if she isn't impressed by the real you than she isn't the right person anyway.

  • Be like Fonzie. How does Fonzie act?

  • First, if you think you're going to get better advice from a woman...ha ha ha most cases you'd be wrong brother. Why? because women will answer this question how they would want a guy to show interest, which is completely opposite of what will cause them to be attracted to a guy.

    Would you like to show her you're interest, or would you rather she shows you she's interested first? Even if she's interested...she's going to do her best to keep you from nowing how much for as long as she can. Why do you want to do the exact opposite?

    The girl you gave the BA to is mistaken. Don't tell her a damn thing. There's no point. You don't need to butter her up before asking her out on the FIRST real date. That other thing was the first meeting...which lasted much too long, and you taking her to your parents house was lame.

    Wait at least 5 days, give her a call, and see if she'll accept a date or not. Be specific about the what, when and where. Simple as that.There's not need to tell a girl how you felt or that you had fun at this point. No need to make things any easier on her than it already is! You're doing all the work...let her wonder how you really feel bro.