2 dates thus far. Can't see her for ~2 wks. Keep in touch or not?

I've gone on two dates with a woman who's a few years older than me. First date happened about 6 wks ago. It was brief but ended with a nice kiss. I had to be out of town for 4 wks, so we could only keep in touch via texts and online for weeks. Second date happened 5 days ago. It went pretty well, and we made out a lot throughout the evening. No sex. Two days later, we briefly hung out at her place in the afternoon and cuddled a bit. Still, no sex. Don't get me wrong; sex isn't the only thing I am after. I see her as my potential girlfriend. She seems to like me as well, but I can't fully gauge her interest level because we still haven't had sex yet. I have no problem waiting, but it is something I need in order to see how much she wants me.

She let me know that we can't hang out for the next 10 days or so because an out-of-state friend is visiting her. Even though I'm very curious about this "friend," I haven't asked her anything about him/her. I don't wanna seem desperate. Also, I wanna give her some room so that she can take some time to evaluate what we have going on right now. We haven't spoken since three days ago. For now, I won't call or text her first. I am sure she'll contact me if she misses me. I just wanna keep escalating the sexual tension between me and her. Am I going about it the right way? As someone who's never been in a serious relationship, I am asking you guys for opinions. Thanks.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • i had one date with my boyfriend and then went away for 3 weeks. I didn't think he'd keep in contact but he text me every day, asking me out in advance the day I got back from hold, kind of sweet. I would never have text him first, never. Nothing to do with him its just I've had a lot of bad experience with that. If she has had bad experience she won't text you.

    If a guy doesn't text me I'm old enough to assume and be okay with him not liking me. I don't sit there for ages thinking about him. At the end of the day its fresh, youve only been on 2 dates, you have to show HER how interested you are in order for her to let you in.

    Also don't depend so much on sex, with girls its different, I didn't have sex with my boyfriend for a while because I wanted to make sure he was genuinely interested in me first.

    Hope this helps, good luck

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What Girls Said 6

  • My boyfriend and I went on 4 dates...and then he had to work 12 consecutive days.

    We didn't sleep together on date 4 because he wanted to let me see that he saw so much more in me and he didn't want me to second guess things since he had to go to an overtime shift the next day.

    He asked me to be his girlfriend that night. 2 weeks later we consummated it and it was wonderful.

    We're 10 months in now and still very happy. <3

    Don't give up so easily and don't over-analyze it. Just communicate with her and find out how she wants to steer it. :)

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  • The sex is normal. I wouldn't have sex with a guy unless I was in love with him. Or at least on serious terms. So-that is good out of her. It means she has morals and standards.

    You should keep in touch by be vague. Text her and say that you hope she is having a good time with her friend. If you are interested to see if it is a guy--you can always "assume" it is a girl and say "hope you're having good girl time with your friend =)" or something like that. You will see by her response if it is a girl. but that is IF you really wanna know.

    Don't text her too often. Once or twice is good. But, I would only text her the 2nd time IF she shows interest after you text her the first time.

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  • I think you should still keep in touch with her. If you didn't see each other for a month in between dates I don't see why 10 days is a big deal. You mentioned that you were not going to talk to her until she initiates the conversation. I think that is a bad idea because girls like when the guys are the ones pursuing. I know it sounds super old school but it is true. Plus why not check in one her while the friend is there and say, "so what did you and your friend do today?" It might give you more insight to determine whether or not this is a girl or guy friend and if they are really JUST friends. But overall I think you have done a good job of not being desperate.

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  • Dude stay in contact with her like ask how she is in random days, don't wait for her call/text because she'll be waiting too.

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  • do you have feelings for her? Do you think if your relationship went on, it would become further? Do you see her in your future? If all those answers are yes, than keep in touch.

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  • I think as the guy you should have texted her by now.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Might as well keep in touch but I would not get hung up over her and would advise continue dating around cause I'm not too sure how interested she really is

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  • I'd stay in touch about as much as you did before, assuming she's responding similarly.

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  • Sex is not a requirement to a girl liking you.

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