Am I being too hard on my ex?

2 months ago my boyfriend got drunk and made out with a random girl at a party. He told me via text the next day and said how sorry he was blah blah blah. Instead of responding, I blocked him on fb, blocked his number and never spoke to him again, not even to respond to his text or to tell him I want tobreak up. He has come to my house crying (my roommate sent him away and I didn't see or speak to him). He has called my house repeatedly, made new accounts on fb to message me, and used other people's phones to call and text me since I blocked his number. He went so far as to go to my parents house to ask my mom to speak to me for him and he has seen me at collee and tried to talk to me but I literally just look right through him as though he's not even there. I have no sympathy for him, but I feel like a bad person because knowing how upset he is makes me happy and I think he deserves it. I don't feel bad when he cried over me like a little girl. Am I being too hard on him?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • i think you are being a bit hard in the sense that you are treating him like he doesn't exist.

    breaking up because of infidelity is your choice. some may take him back some wouldn't

    but to just completely shut him out is a bit far. we are humans, we make mistakes, but we are also all worthy of foregiveness. it doesn't mean you take him back, but it means you let him voice his feelings, you work on forgiving and maybe it also gives you a chance to explain precisely why you can't be with him and why he needs to give you space

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What Guys Said 5

  • I would think so, mainly because its making you happy that he's crying for you, that's a little weird, you have the utmost right to be hurt, but not mentally trying to destroy his mind, but maybe you should at least hear what he has to say for his actions. Cheating is wrong, once a cheater, always a cheater, that's my philosophy. I not telling you to forgive him, but you should just tell him to give up because he cheated, he should pay for his mistakes. being drunk isn't a reason to cheat, and it isn't a way of life either.

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  • When inebriated, would this ex of yours commit a felony or give his life savings away? I think not. In my opinion, drinking is never an excuse for a person to behave inappropriately or stray from their commitment to their partner. It's simply an excuse to blame their actions on something other than themselves. An escape goat, if you will.

    That being said, cheating is a reprehensible act, and you should never compromise your principles to be with someone. If cheating effectively ended the relationship, then you are not obligated to hear him out.

    Is that harsh, sure it, but is it fair? Yes, again.

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  • hard on him? na

    Does it sound like you never cared at all? You bet it does

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  • you both need closure. Tell him it's over once and for all.

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  • Yes, you are. He was your boyfriend, you had a romantic relationship. If he screwed up and you don't want to see him anymore, the least he deserves is for you to tell him. You owe him, even if you hate him and don't want to see him again. Because of what you shared.

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What Girls Said 1

  • You say you don't care at all, but you are asking this question on here. Even though you think you may not care, there is a little part of you sub-consciously feeling sorry for him. Now I completely agree with you, that is absolutely inacceptable for him to make out with another girl and you did the right thing in ending it. However I think you need to move on from enjoying his suffering. Yeah he made a mistake, a big mistake and trust me he will pay for it for a long time, just knowing that he lost you to some cheap kiss. But you need to be the better lady here and close this situation. I would agree to talk to him, tell him that cheating was never going to be acceptable to you and that you cannot forgive him for it at the moment. Bluntly say you will never be getting back together with him, not just for the cheating but for all the other things he has ruined, the trust, the loyalty and the care between you both. It is ruined. Put him out of his misery and tell him to move on, it is over. He needs to hear this, otherwise he will just keep trying to contact you and keeping false hope. For both your sakes end it and move on. :)

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