Why do nice, well educated, intelligent guys date these "kind" of girls?

The guy I am dating is intelligent, has a great job, good looking, respecttable- he's 50 and had his share of girlfriend. he's told me about them- how they were all crazy, one was a stripper, one was 20 years younger than him, one was on drugs, one was married-, most didn't have jobs or cars and used him.

I don't understand why a guy that has his stuff together would go out with girls like this.

Im not like any of these previous girls and wonder what he sees in me if he likes these other kinds of women?

Updates:
wow a lot of great answers

so how about the last part of my question, what does he see in me if he likes these other kinds of women?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think it's because guys are way too motivated by a girl's body to the point where they don't excuse obvious facts about the girl that make dating her more trouble than it's worth. Strippers are hard to date for example because a guy wanting a committed relationship is typically going to have trouble sleeping at night knowing she's showing off her body to people. The other situations you described are just flat out obvious but I don't know as to when he found out about the drugs, or the marriage, and so on. He could have immediately dumped them upon finding out those things. But as for something like not having a car, it was his choice to put up with that. I dated a girl with no car thinking she was going to get one but once she told me it was gonna be 2 years I dumped her after some arguing. It wasn't tragic but I gave it a chance.

    Thing is, finding a girl who has her stuff together is actually tough. Part of the problem lies within the fact that people's attraction to negativity is so high. Plenty of girls do not want a stable relationship even though they say so because once things are stable, they get bored.

    As for him choosing these kinds of girls, maybe he doesn't feel like he's good enough so his sympathy gets the best of him and he gives them a chance. Girls do the same thing and it's why so many guys think that treating a girl like trash is how you win a girl over.

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What Guys Said 7

  • You can't ask why a guy with a 'great job' would date women like that. Your implication is that since he is successful he could date other women. From his perspective those other women who would be also dating him partly because of his 'great job' are no less into his money then the strippers.

    I think you're falling into the trap that 'successful people would of course want to date people like themselves'. It's not quite true. Women and men do not value the same things evenly in a partner. Women value success, job and responsibility more then men do, especially if those men are not considering marrying and having children.

    Why did he see in them? That they were attractive and probably freaks in bed. The best I then he might have liked their company as people as well.

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  • I'd advise you to be seriously careful of any guy who says that all of his exes are "crazy".

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  • Women their age didn't want them when they were young and now they're making up for it. They got their shht together and and they say to themselves "who should I go for? the young stripper who's only out for my money or the older woman who never gave me the time of day when I was poor but NOW since I have money notices me? which one should he pick? Women , no matter how old or young will be out for a guys money pure and simple.

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  • You can have a thousand guys that are intelligent, good looking, respectable and with great jobs and they can all still be very, very different.

    Your guy might be too kind, emphatic or so and thus 'easily useable'.

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  • Lust, and love, can make a man, even an intelligent and rational man, do weird things...

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  • Well a girls financial economic background is nowhere near as important as a guys

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  • Being nice, having a great job and being good looking and intelligent is great, but these are secondary factors in being successful with a girl. The one major thing a guy needs is charm/confidence.

    Maybe when he was younger, he just didn't have the charm/confidence to be successful with the level of girls that his other qualities would suggest that he should go for.

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What Girls Said 5

  • probably just fun,midlife crisis stuff-and now he's calmed down

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  • Because guys like that want a hot girl and will settle for the fact that he has to give her money if he wants to be with her. They offer fun, excitement and sex appeal so he'll trade money to get it.

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  • Gee, why would a guy want to date a stripper?

    For the most part, having a hot woman to have sex with is on the top of a guy's priority list. They get their sh*t together so they can impress women with good bodies. They don't care whether a woman has an education or a great personality. They care whether they have a nice rack and a high sex drive.

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  • Damsel in distress complex that every guy has.

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  • some guys want to "save" girls. to make himself feel better.

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