Long distance weird thing dilemma, what's the best way of dealing with his situation?

Background story:

I went for an extended weekend trip (4days) to the west coast for a mini vacation and a semi look out for grad school about 6 months ago. Met a guy, hit it off, and eventually hooked up with him all in one night. Was completely smitten with him, but I knew that LDR never works so for a couple of times I've mentioned to him that I wanted to stop communicating at the beginning despite him persuading me to continue to keep in touch . But I caved in in the end, and kept in contact with him regardless. But over the course of us keeping in contact together, I've discovered that he's still active on an online dating site, and I'm pretty sure that at least at one point he was going after this one girl.

Also, he has always been saying that we should meet up in another city but he never did actually do it. So, since then I've always kind of taken what he said half heartedly.

What's going to happen:

Grad school applications are fast approaching and I have limited time to only prep for only a few of them. Since I'm seriously considering some schools out west, so I've decided to head out west to actually look at all of them (i've only seen one last time). A friend was going to go with me, but she couldn't anymore. I've mentioned to the guy that I'll be coming back out for a week. Then he offered me a place to stay for free and told me that he can take a week off of work, and go off to places with me. Him offering a place and splitting some fees with me will actually save me a whole chunk of money, money that I'm saving up for grad school.

Expectation:

i've asked him if he expected anything out of this, then he replied with-

"I do my best not to expect things. If I set the bar too high, I might get hurt. It's kind of a defence mechanism for me. I recognize the potential in our situation, and that excites me. But that's it".

Question:

From his reply, it seems like he just wants to have sex with me and have a good time. Though he never tells me of his "secret" shenanigans with other girls, I am aware of them. Then why is he doing all of this? Keeping in contact for 6 months straight everyday in the first place? Also, after knowing all of these things with the whole active online dating site, him actively trying to pursue other girls, etc, I just want to treat him as a friend... but I feel like he will definitely be expecting physical stuff for a week... So, what's the best way of dealing with this situation?


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What Girls Said 1

  • He doesn't want to try up make it work

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