Why are many guys on dating sites very shallow, pushy, and angry?

Okay I know there are still many good guys who don't do this but from what I have encountered,many of them can be very demanding on dating site.By demanding here means they sent one line message like 'hi or hey' and expect the girls to reply them instantly.When you don't,they sent you harsh messages and even bash you out.

Some even visited my profile and immediately sent me message without reading my preferences or descriptions on the part "about me" I know this because on the profile visitors showed how long have they visited before they sent me the message.

Its like " visited few seconds ago" wtf?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • They have issues. They're like demanding children. Maybe they were coddled as children, always got their way and felt entitled to things. Consider that a good warning sign because if he's that crazy to get mad when a stranger doesn't reply to one message..how bad would be to date?

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What Guys Said 11

  • The reason you get this is because the guys who have visited your profile, are the guys who are not really interested in you, just what they think you have on offer, IE your pictures, how pretty you are, what type of body you have, but if a guy was interested in you, he would want to know as much about you as possible before committing to get in touch, and your preferences would certainly be taken into account,x

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  • well, some of these guys are somewhat disgruntled, because they couldn't get the date in offline, so they had to turn to plan B. That can make them feel afraid that they may end up alone if their "last ditch effort" sort of speak, doesn't work. That might explain the pushiness. The angriness can be explained by the fact that they are competing with so many guys online, for a very small pool of women. On top of this, women on these sites ignore most messages they get (they can be a lot more selective than guys) so that just adds to the frustration, which builds into anger. Shallow? well yeah...but when it comes to online dating, they aren't any more or less shallow than women are. Not knocking on women here, but if they weren't shallow, they'd probably respond to more messages from guys on these dating sites. Both guys and girls are looking for their dream partner when they go on these sites

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  • Well hey guess what!? When women have a staunch list of demands you call "preferences" and god damn you to a thousand hells should only 99 out of 100 be met it can cause that.

    I am sure there are plenty of men that fit what you claim to want but you have so many messages you just wait to see if someone better comes along perpetuating things and wasting others time.

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    • lmao 'you deserve to get messages like that cos you're a girl and girls frustrate me'

    • I'll will wait until you evolve a bit to try to make sense of that comment.

  • Online dating sites are lame! The women get like 200 messages a day, and your message will probably hit the trash bin if your not a pretty boy like trey songz or a young brad pit or something. So it's almost a complete waste of time to online date... Someone else said this, the women have a long list of demands Sometimes and I agree! If she decides you haven't msny like 2 demands out of 100 thrn she's

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    • Then she's on to the next person and you probably just wasted all that time trying to sell and promote yourself like a car salesmen. I tried a dating site once in my life and it showed me that too many fakes lie about who they really are so u can't believe the pictures or even the words you read on a profile cuz chances are that they're lying to get attention. The people take pictures with Soo msny edits that you don't know what's real or fake... You can manipulate sun light, shadows, edit eye color, edit out scars, even add people into the picture... It's insane. And when a guy has to cypher through all that and put up with the possible chance of being rejected I'm pretty sure he's gonna be angry and bitter

  • Because rejection causes emotional distress. Most guys on online dating suffer massive amounts of rejection, constant and repeated rejection will intensify these feelings.

    (want to put a link here but can't because I'm not level 4+, just read the wikipedia article on social rejection)

    Or you can ignore reality and agree with the female answerers that these men are subhuman monsters for displaying normal human behavior.

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  • I Think it's a coincidence you met so many weird guys in a row xD or maybe that's just the kind of people that Use dating sites

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  • Leave the datingsites and find someone irl instead xD

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    • You aren't answering my question.20 x per? Oh okay.

  • Kick a nice dog enough times and eventually you'll have a mean dog on your hands.

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  • Guys have no clue how to flirt or what women want. Most are insecure and sexually frustrated. Don't take them seriously and you will be fine.

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  • There must be many awesome guys on there too, because I get very few replies and have never gotten a date, despite having a very complete profile and despite sending unique messages that show that I've actually read the girl's profile.

    Since there are so many guys on there compared to the number of girls, of course you're going to get messages like that.

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  • because for every one girl on there there's about 30 some guys. its heavily stacked in the girls favor. so you will get many jaded guys who have been ignored many many times by the girls on there. they are just releasing their frustration out on you

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What Girls Said 4

  • Yeah. This is something that happens a lot. I don't know about these guys. I think if you get with them they're *definitely* gonna be abusive, that kinda behavior is just so f***ed up. Avoid them like the plague.

    You know on OKCupid, there's that question that goes, 'is there ever a time when a woman is obligated to have sex with you?' and some guys say 'Yes'? Yeah. There's a lot of guys to avoid on dating websites.

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    • look at all these guys saying it's normal. Avoid THOSE guys, too.

  • If I hear one more sappy story about how hard it is for men I'm becoming a lesbian or a nun. It's always about them, about how rejected *they* are, how mean women are, how bitchy women are, how high women's standards are. So why is it that I haven't a single, sincere man yet and just these cowardly dorks who play these elaborate games just to get laid? Women don't trust you for a reason. Regardless of why you're pushy... what about all the men we email who never bother to reply because they didn't like how *we* looked? If you come off as demanding and pushy like you're the big boss man and I should do whatever you want because you are entitled and I am lucky to have your attention... that's not a very good indicator as to how you may be as a loving a boyfriend or husband. Are you going to slap me for talking back? Lock me in the house so other guys won't look at me?

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  • I think a lot of them are generally frustrated by the process itself.

    Think about it... how many messages (or whatever) do you think men send on those sites? And never get a response? Not even a no thank you. It can become frustrating and I think they start getting pushy because they just want someone to respond, yes or no.

    I noticed the same thing when I used to try online dating. Men were furious if I didn't respond within an hour. It happens.

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  • Because they are whiny little children

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