I am 18 and I am dating a 48 year old!

Hey I am 18 and I am just finishing high school. I've been talking to this guy I met online for almost two years. At first we were just really good friends. He is 48 and he is thirty years older than me. I recently progressed feelings toward him and told him and he said he always he thought I was hot. This surprised me..in a good way! So now we are dating and I'm like in love with him, I don't care about the age difference. We might meet someday and we have been skyping and talking on the phone alot. I have sexual urges too when I talk to him. He's just great. Do you think this relationship is wrong? Or is it okay? What do you think?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I generally believe that age is only a number, but he is over half your age.

    My first boyfriend was nine years older (he was 26 and I was 17) and I met him online. He seemed so, so great when we were just messaging each other, but when we actually started dating he actually wasn't so great. He ended up only being after sex.

    If you really like him, and know for definite that his intentions are genuinely good, then do whatever makes you happy. Just make sure he's not married (which is likely for a man his age).

    Also, know that if you both meet someday, your relationship may not be approved. My mother hated the idea of me being with a guy nine years older than me, never mind thirty.

    Also, if you're going to meet up with him, be extremely careful and meet up in a very public place. People can seem so nice when they text and call you, but for all you know, he could be planning on taking you and selling you as a sex slave, or even raping you.

    Good luck. I hope it goes well. But please make sure you are careful.

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What Guys Said 14

  • I don't see this ending well. I'll probably take a lot of crap for saying this, but guys who go for women WAY younger than them typically do so because they're immature, and women their own age won't put up with them because of it. I mean, think about it: What could a guy who is almost 50 possibly have in common with someone who is just finishing high school? If he really did act his age, then what about teenage life could possibly be of interest to him? Those two stages of life are so far apart, I don't think there's any way that they could reasonably mesh. I'm sure you probably think that you're just exceptionally mature for your age (doesn't every teenager?), but this is pushing it in ways that you're probably NOT mature enough to understand yet.

    I know that women like to date older men because they think that it makes them more mature, so I don't think that you'll take my advice... or that of anyone else, for that matter. But keep in mind what I said: What kind of a 48-year-old man feels more at ease with an 18-year-old?

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    • This makes a lot of sense. Please re-read this response and heed the above poster!

  • Be very very careful because honestly, most guys who are into people that young are creepers. There are very few relationships that end up good in that situation and the girl gets used for sex.. Chances are the guy just wants a young girl to have sex with.

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    • mk so he has emotional issues for wanting to date a girl who could easily be his daughter, but she doesn't have issues for wanting to date a guy who could easily be her dad? I mean that is like 2 generations.

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    • He'll probably take it as free sex by emotionally charming you into sleeping with him.

    • see! you said you might take it as daddy issues but seeing as we have no information about her homw life it's just kind of a toss up. That being said. I think she is an adult and can do as she wish however, that doesn't mean I don't find it creepy

  • I'd seriously question this guys morals. There's no way in hell I'd date someone 30 years younger than me, especially if they just became an adult. Sure when I'm 48 and out in public; I'll see a young woman who's probably 18 and think they look good or whatever, but I'd never hit on them and try to date them even if they liked me. I'd just look and keep it moving. Sure there are couples who are 30/50, but you're not that far removed from being a minor. Someone like him probably can't cope with that the fact the days of his prime are long gone. Think about it, if you guys actually dated, do you think he'd introduce you to his family? If they are people with good sense, they'd look at him with disgust and so would your family. This guys only motive has to be sex because that's as far as it could go with you.

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  • Dating is fine, I'd date an older woman easily enough... On practical terms though I'd have to consider it realistically. When I'm older is being in a relationship with someone who is approaching their 70's/80's really what I want? Probably not. Especially since I want kids and they will probably be past their sexual peak.

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  • Wow. F***yes, it's wrong.

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  • You say you are dating ... do you mean online dating?

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    • Yes and we are gonna meet

    • If you meet, you do this in some very public place the first few times. There are many bad people online who are experts at making you think they are interested in you.

  • I think that's a little old for you personally. I even think myself dating an 19 year old is borderline too much of a difference. Do you have trouble with guys more near your age?

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    • This is the first time I have ever had feelings for a guy this old. I've never dated anyone past 22 until I met him, he's just special

    • You mean he treats you nice right?

  • kinda creepy. I'd guess you have daddy issues.

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  • A 30-year age difference is a bit much, but it's not unprecedented. The bigger issue is that you've never met this guy. Until you meet in person and see what chemistry you have together, you essentially have a pen pal.

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  • I honestly think that that is to big of a age difference.

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  • I think this sounds completely bogus.

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  • gross!

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  • Do whatever makes you feel happy. You're both grown and that's all that really matters. No one would even have a problem with it if you were 48 and he was 18.

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    • At 18 a person most likely doesn't have a career, live on his/her own, pay their own insurance, and so on. Plus in the US they can't drink alcohol if you really wanna talk about that too. Most 18 year olds do not have life experience.

    • Yeah no duh they can't drink. You can't also run for president unless you're 35 . She's grown legally and that's all that really matters. If she was a 18 year old guy and he was a 48 year old woman, no one would even making a big deal about this.

  • do whatever makes you happy. just be smart about it.

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What Girls Said 11

  • You are not really dating him as you haven't even met him yet... So basically you don't even know him.

    It is totallly creepy, as an adult, to tell someone 30 years old younger than you that you want to build something with the person. The young person is a "baby" and you are an adult and...adults are meant to protect younger ones...nothing else and even else anything physical!

    This situation, in an adult point of view, doesn't make any sense even if it can make him mentally feel good for some reasons (usually what many people would consider as personal issues).

    I truly think it will be a mistake from your part to keep going this way.

    One more thing is that...he is 48 years old! A good guy who is 48 years old should be married already with kids probably close to your age...and if he is not, then there is probably a good reason for it!

    Just imagine your dad doing this...wouldn't you be weirded out?

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    • I always see dating profiles saying "Don't message me if you are old enough to be my father." There's very good reasons for it.

    • I definitely agree with you!

  • I personally think it's creepy. I'm 19 and my dad is 42...I can't even imagine dating someone as old as him or older. The thought just disgusts me. But as long as it's legal, to each their own I suppose.

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  • I think it could become a problem if you wanted to have kids with him. He will be 60 when his child is just 12. But other than that I don't see a problem as long as you are happy. But like others have said I would question his motives for wanting to date someone so young. Don't let him break your heart.

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  • I'm 25 and my dad is 48. I would never even consider dating a 48-year-old guy.

    But, whatever rocks your boat. Although you gotta consider what Ladsin said... Did you not grow up with a father? Or did your father somehow abused you? What did you like from that 48-y.o. that you can't find in guys your age? I think you should assess your own psyche a little here. Also try to think what his intention might be. Be careful, he might be experienced while you're not, so he could be using that to manipulate you into doing things you don't want to. And I think it's creepy for him to hit on a girl young enough to be his daughter, for God's sake.

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    • He doesn't have any bad intentions... I know this guy. He's never made me feel uncomfortable at all

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    • exactly my point. I think it's possible that this guy is using the fact that you are so young. He babies you, making you think he wants all good things for you, making you feel appreciated, loved, desired, comfortable, safe. When all they wanted is an 18 year old fresh p****. Sorry if I'm being blunt here, but I think there's something creepy about him going for a girl 30 years younger. 30! That's a lot of years! When he was an adult you were born! Imagine that.

    • haha somebody gave me props XP

  • The relationship is not wrong. You just need to proceed with caution. Life is a learning expeirence so live and experience it. Safety is your number one concern no matter how safe you feel with him. Society would say yes it is wrong. If you can maintain a healthy relationship with him, OK, possible. The dynamics of your relationship may turn out to be different than two people of the same age. That is OK. Like I said, just proceed with caution

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  • it doesn't sound good when you knew him when you were just sixteen. He's old enough to be your father.

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  • I think it's too much of a gap. I like older guys, and have dated a few, but the oldest I would go is like 35ish. But if you're happy, who cares what others think?

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  • Idk if you're a troll or not but if you're not and you want an honest opinion, yes it's wrong.

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  • Holy f***ing sh*t ! And I thought me (21) dating a 38 is bad !

    Wow... plesse don't do it !

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  • Nooooo. I'm sorry this is so wrong,

    Watch the movie (TRUST) and you will change your mind.

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  • disgusting in my opinion, what's wrong with you?

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    • Why is it disgusting? Everyone has plenty of things wrong with them and I don't see what that has to do with her question

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