Girls, why don't you respond to guys who write genuine messages on dating websites?

I mean every profile says 'no creepers' or 'if you are just looking for sex don't bother', well I'm a genuine guy looking for a relationship, yet every message I've sent has been ignored.

Why?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • This is something I've never really understood either.

    When I was on a dating site, the only messages I completely ignored were creepy/nasty/inappropriate messages.

    I think some people operate on the idea that they should only respond to those they're actually interested in, which to me seems pretty rude.

    I actually made some friends while on a dating site because I'd respond to any nice, genuine message. If I wasn't interested, I'd say so. And men did the same for me. And a few friendships came from that, which is actually pretty cool.

    I guess they just aren't interested so they don't want to SAY that, so they just ignore your message. It could be anything - it could be your profile details, your pictures, maybe that you just aren't their type or they have different interests/goals, it could be the message itself they didn't like. Unfortunately, you'll never know unless one of them actually tells you.

    I'm sorry though, I know it sucks. No response is just cold, in my opinion.

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    • Why wouldn't people only respond/message to people they're actually interested in? I mean I've been in the same boat as the question asker plenty of times, but it's better to be rejected than led on. To me, I find it more frustrating to have some girl respond to me and talk for awhile only for it to lead nowhere than to be rejected/ignored upfront. When you're rejected, you move on to the next one. If you're led on, it hurts when you actually develop feelings for that person.

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    • Well responding isn't leading on necessarily, but a waste of time imo. I send out tons of messages and am lucky to get 2/10 replies. I mean rejection sucks and comes with the territory, but I'm just saying if they're not interested to begin with, then I'd rather have them not respond then message back even if it's to say they're not interested. One time I sent a polite message to a girl about similar interests and her response to me was you look like a pedophile. To me that was uncalled for.

    • I also forgot to add though that when I'm going on a dating site, I'm looking for dates and relationships, not friends. It's different when you're friends with a person you like in the real world, but I've seen some girls say they're just looking for friends on a dating site then it's like why are you even on a dating site unless they have some ulterior motive. Do you really need to use a dating site for friends?

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Guys Said 2

  • Just keep trying, sometimes it does take awhile, but remember it doesn't matter how many girls reject/ignore you but the ones who say yes do.

    What site are you using?

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  • The irony is that if you are looking to online date at your age, the last place to go is a dating website.

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