Am I just an option?

So I met this guy Danny on okCupid (he messaged me first) and we hit it off right away when we were messaging back and forth. He gave me his number a day later but I felt like I kept sending the first texts in the morning or afternoon. He did send one once but yea. A few days later, I really wanted to meet him so I asked if he wanted to go do something and he was on board! We went to golf and stuff and he paid for the mini golf. The outing only lasted 2 hours since he had to go be with his mom by a certain time but I texted him later that night and he said he had a great time! What I'm wondering about is why he never texts me first and at all anymore!? We haven't talked at all for 2 days so I sent him "hey I just wanted to see how you were doing while I'm on my lunch break since I haven't heard from you in a while."

I was told by some coworkers that he is just thinking of me as an option right now but for a guy that seemed so interested in me and liked talking me, it doesn't seem that way. What do you think?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I just was dealing with that... I was a bit more enthusiastic talking to a girl on okcupid for a week or so, then not as interested.

    In my case, I wasn't as interested, and there was a girl on campus I wanted to ask out, so I stopped chatting. That didn't work, ended up getting asked out by the okcupid girl. I didn't want to meet, but a female friend convinced me I should give the girl a chance. The okcupid girl had been acting all enthusiastic and into me while I was pretty much ignoring her, so I gave it a try.

    Of course, it was a flop, because the girl was a party girl used to hooking up. She showed up acting all cold and awkward, I tried to be light and friendly, and ended up being boring, because she was used to the rush of hooking up with guys immediately, bahah. That's life, girls prefer it when you're aloof and ignoring them somewhat. Know for next time.

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What Guys Said 8

  • Haha, I thought I was the only GAG user in Ventura!

    Anyway, some people go on OKCupid just to chat. Maybe you could look at the questions he's answered...one of them says "Would you be willing to meet in person" and another asks something like "How serious you are in finding someone?" Did his profile say Seeking Females "For new friends" or did he add anything else?

    A lot of guys don't like texting either. He might be really caught up with other issues, especially considering he could only squeeze a couple hours in because he had to do something with his mom. I wouldn't jump to the "Option" conclusion so quickly, but the possibility is there. Regardless, I wouldn't worry too much about him, you could look at it as a first date that didn't spark anything.

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  • Some guys just don't like to text. But if you're having to do all the asking out, he may not be that into you.

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  • Well yeah you're one of many options. He's still figuring out what he wants.

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  • Maybe. Wait a little longer to see if he comes back around. Your gorgeous btw!

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  • yes

    we all are

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  • If fairy boy has to cut his date short to go home to mommy, I see major warning signs.

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  • Nutssssssss I wish I met someone like you from OkC

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  • Nobody but him knows what he's thinking. Anyone answering here with some certain answer is talking out of their buttocks. Either way, he obviously has leverage in this game or you wouldn't be asking this. That is enough said.

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What Girls Said 3

  • He probably thought 1. You're a little too homey for him

    or 2. You're not the hot and mysterious type that did not kept him interested for long

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  • Well you've been on one date, you are not in a committed relationship. He's most likely playing the field. So I say just lay off. Texting him a lot and bugging him will push him even further away. The fact that you had to ask him out and you're always texting him is not a good sign. As I said before, just give him space and wait for him to text you. If he doesn't then his loss.

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  • play a little harder to get and don't text him so much.

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