If you date a guy for a few months without labels...

and you do every single thing that a boyfriend and girlfriend would do (besides have sex), would the guy already consider you as his girlfriend, even though you haven't talked about putting titles on each other? And if not, then what would you even consider each other? We're more than just friends, but not "officially" boyfriend/girlfriend.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I hate the term "making it official". It reminds me so much of teenages writing notes in class asking "Will you be my Girlfriend? <3"

    If you've only been on a few dates and no sex, I think it's too early to worry about. If you've been on a lot of dates, done a lot of intimate sexual things without going all the way, or especially if you do have sex and are just confused about his feelings towards you there's definitely a time and a reason to sit down and decide if you're both serious and want the same thing from each other.

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What Guys Said 7

  • I think it's at the point where you should just talk to him about it

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  • FWB

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  • I would consider it "seeing someone"...but nothing serious.

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  • yes

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  • why not?

    Sometimes being exclusive is a matter of subtlety and not something said outright.

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    • that's true, I guess I just want the satisfaction of being able to say "he's my boyfriend" and have it be official, rather than saying "we've been on a few dates but I don't know exactly." thank you!

    • ask him what he wants out of it. or tell him that you like him.

  • No, you can't automatically put titles on that, I'm in a similar situation, I live 3000miles away from my hometown, and I fly home often and met an amazing girl, and we hooked up and saw each other all the time, now I'm 3000 miles away again we decided we wouldn't have titles until there are no miles between us because distance doesn't work its funny though how both of us staying single makes it work.. we Skype, watch movies together, she even plays video games with me, we do everything in our power to still be able to see one another, I still travel home to her, and were loyal to each other even if were not together. we both classify what we have is a complicated relationship.

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  • If we didn't have sex yet, I definitely wouldn't call her my girlfriend. I'd say she's "a friend" (with the quotes and all) or "special friend" but I wouldn't say she's my girlfriend.

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What Girls Said 3

  • He might consider you two as friends with benefits. I think you should have "the talk" with him ASAP if you're not okay with that (and if you'd like to be his girlfriend). If he still insists on fooling around without giving your relationship an official label, you might want to consider finding someone else who's ready for commitment (assuming you're also looking for commitment). Good luck. :)

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    • I've been told that all friends with benefits is, is casual sex. which I totally would refuse to let happen. and I know he doesn't see me as an "object" if you will, and I know I'm not getting played. I have remarkable senses for that crap lol thank you!

    • FWB is casual sex at its face value - no defending that. But the willingness to spend time together other than sex is also there. But it would be counter-productive to dress this up as a stepping stone to boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. It is not, and the balance of power is in favor of the party in this relationship who does not care to move to bf/gf. So if you're not the one not wanting to move to bf/gf, get used or get out.

  • You should ask him what are you, because you're together for some time... If you don't ask him that, he may think that you're just friends with some benefits.. And it's only a matter of time when are you going to start sleeping together, and in my opinion, you should sleep with someone who sees you as his girlfriend, not just "booty call".

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  • you need to talk about it because you never know.

    it also depends on other things. how long has it been? did you meet his friend and family? do you go to each others houses all the time? what are your conversations like?

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    • it's been a couple months. he lives with his best friend, who I was friends with before I met him. and his family lives across the country and have not visited since we've been "together". yes, we go to each others' houses quite frequently and just hang out and enjoy the company. our conversations aren't dirty, they're just normal and friendly and flirtatious.

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