Guys, would you be insulted if a girl paid?

I've been out with a lot of different guys and I always find it funny when the check comes and watching each guys different reaction. I've dated guys that made me pay for everything. I've also dated guys that positively refused to let me even split the bill. One time a begged a guy to let me pay for our third date and he hesitantly agreed and then explained to the waitress why I was paying. I thought it was nice, but a little over the top and maybe more about him than me.

What do you think about paying? What do you think is the difference in these different mindsets?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • No, I would not be insulted. I'm old-fashioned in many ways...I'm a gentleman, I'm chivalrous, I will absolutely defend and protect her, and I'll treat her like a lady and respect her. But I will not buy her.

    I do ALWAYS pay for a first date, though. It just feels like the right thing to do, and really it's just the way I like it. Beyond that though, I like it if we go out and just take turns paying...I get one, she gets one. And I'm not a huge fan of splitting because that sorta seems platonic.

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What Guys Said 5

  • I would find it aggravating if she made a huge deal of it every single time I took her out. On the other hand though, I'd let her pay once in a while. I know she's not some useless delicate little flower who needs her hand held through life, and I'm going to imply as much by never letting her take care of herself. Also it's nice to know she isn't just all about my money.

    That being said, I would still pay most of the time.

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  • I have let the woman pay before and it doesn't sit well with me. I feel like a worthless tool. There was a time I was totally extended buying a house so I just couldn't scratch up any extra scratch so that was a difficult time dating this one girl. We didn't last long enough for me to repay the favor and that still bothers me. I feel I should send her a check for all our dinners.

    It never bothers me to pay for anything for her tho..

    Most real men have a instinct to provide for. So that is actually hardwired in me. Cannot explain it just is !

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  • No I wouldn't be insulted if a girl paid, as long as it's not all the time cause than I would feel like I'm using her which I don't/hate doing. I guess the idea(I could be wrong and not trying to be sexist) that men always pay's for dates stems back to when men worked while stayed at home, so naturally men always paid since women didn't work and make money. Now days men and women equally work, so a woman paying once in a while just shows she cares and isn't using him.

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    • As for the first date, I guess it's who ever done the asking out that pays, but after the first couple I doesn't matter who pays as long as both are happy :).

  • I like to split it every time

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  • I wouldn't feel insulted. Only a fool would feel insulted.

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What Girls Said 3

  • I wouldn't necessarily say they feel "insulted," but I do think a lot of guys feel weird about letting a girl pay for even her half of the bill. Judging by the guys I've dated, it's just the way they were raised -- they've kind of had it beaten into their heads that a guy is supposed to take care of the girl as far as things like that are concerned. Personally, I hate it and wish that less guys felt like that's the way it has to be.

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  • TO an old-fashioned, masculine guy, a girl paying offends their masculinity. Call me old-fashioned, but I think it should. I always offer to pay, but I secretly judge if they actually let me. (I'm talking about like a dinner date here, not a big trip or something. That's different.)

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  • I think most men are insulted

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