How long should you wait before you start dating again?

If you've been in a relationship for over 4 years and things don't work out at that point, how long should you wait to start dating again?

Is it longer, and if so how long, if you have a kid together?


Most Helpful Girl

  • First off, there is no set time of when is "right" to start dating again. You will be ready when and only when you have worked through the healing of the last relationship. If you are able to go on a date without thinking of your ex, if you are not still sad about it, if you aren't on the rebound than you are ok. But that takes time sometimes.

    Things are different once kids are involved. Your priority is your kids and you have to be cautious of who you choose to be around your kids. Kids don't need to see a lot of guys in and out of your life. that's not fair to them at all and it can confuse them.


What Guys Said 4

  • I agree that there is no set time, but 4 years is a long relationship, so you can expect that it will take a while before you can date again, probably 6 months to a year. FWIW, I was in a two year relationship that ended 4 months ago, and I'm just starting to think I might be able to start dating again.

  • There is no set " right time" to date again just make sure to give yourself ample time to get over it and don't rush into another relationship without learning from your last one. The right time is when you are comfortable dating again. Some people are ready sooner than others and some just have to meet the right person to be ready.

  • It doesn't matter. It's up to you. When you meet someone you love go for it. You only have one life and sitting around moping is wasting it away. Now if you have kids (especially if they are older then 3) it may take longer for them to accept the fact that their parents are split. I hope this helps. :)

  • People are always saying you need to wait you need time this and that when really it all depends on you if you feel like you are ready to move on then you should. There is no standard time.


What Girls Said 7

  • Date when you are ready, I am going thro the same thing, the only difference is that I am currently pregnant with our second child. But my best advice is date when you feel that you are ready too until then just sit back and enjoy being a parent.

  • no time limit whenever you think you can be compatible w/someone again.

    4yrs steimation 12months if you mean how long it will take for you to get over it.

  • I've been single for nearly 2 years. I'm not going to count the one relationship I had in those 2 years to be much of a relationship. The main point is that I'm still a little fearful of guys in general because I had a bad relationship 2 years ago and the guy is a jerk.

    If I had a kid, I would make sure I could have some time for myself to date and someone else take care of him/ her. I would probably wait a month or two till at least I heal and can recover from the last relationship. there really isn't a set time on those things.

  • I would say that it depends on when things started to go wrong in the relationship. In other words, sometimes people stay in bad relationships for a long time for whatever reason, but their heart has already moved on. If that is not the case, I would wait at least 6 months before dating again. At least. The main thing is that you are not just getting into another relationship because you are afraid to be alone. I think you will know deep down whether or not that is the case. If you are afraid to be alone, then you need to spend some time along to gain security in yourself. Otherwise, if you have been emotionally over him for awhile and want to date someone because you really like them (vs. being afraid to be alone), then go for it. Just take it REALLY SLOW, because what tends to happen is that we break-up with someone and go for somone who is opposite of the type of person we were with before. That can cause us to become deceived about whether or not we really like the person or just want something totally different than what we had before. Whatever you do, don't have sex for awhile. A long while. And expect some grief from those around you.

    To answer your question about the child, I would say that you should wait longer if you have a child or just make sure you keep the dating separate from the child. Don't expose the child to any new man until you are in a committed, long-term relationship.

  • I think it varies by person and relationship...for instances...I was in a relationship for a year and I am still not completely healed and ready to move on 9 months later...

    I think you should take 6 months and work on yourself. You should reevaluate your dreams, desires, and aspirations. Examine the past relationship and try to learn from it.

    I think taking ample time to heal after a breakup is prevents more emotional hurt and baggage in the future...

    Take as long as you want...there is no set time and don't be in rush to jump back out into the dating scene...let yourself heal.

  • at least a month