Is it selfish to not ask a woman on a date?

This question might not put me in the best light. I usually don't ask women out on dates because I would have to pay and I don't want to do that. Yeah I said it. However, a lot of women use men for free meals and dates when they're not even into the guy. I understand you think I'm selfish and cheap, but oh well. People claim I will be a virgin for the rest of my life (which I have no problem with) because of this. I usually go out on my own and do my own thing. There are sometimes where I have to be selfish and cheap and I think this is one of those times. Is it wrong for me to cautious in this matter?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • :) I'm actually just like you - I'm incredibly cheap and proud of it.

    But then again, I venture to guess that you are going to get a lot of hate for this question from girls; but dates can be ultra cheap, it can be just the usage of the soles of your shoes as you can have a date with simply walking in the park.

    If she were to say "No, I wanna dinner date!" then she's not worth it imo

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    • Surprisingly, I've received no hate...yet.

    • Thanks for ba :) Well, reverse psychology often does wonders ;)

What Girls Said 7

  • That is not ture. If that's true for you, you need to look wt the girls you are picking. I always intend to pay for myself on a date I think ots just awkward just expecting the guy to do it. I once went on this dare and the guy would mot let me pay for myself and I found it unattractive. It would be different ifhe just offered but he would not let me say no. And you can ask women out on dates Iike places that don't need money like a park or a lake or things like that. I like to be independent and I never want to be that girl who relies on the man for things when I'm totally capable myself. It just dependson the girl. I assume most girls won't force yoy to pay for them just say your spliting the bill

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  • You know there's lots of things you can do for free on a date, right? Or at least cheap things. Like lafemmedeschats suggested, a picnic. Or just a stroll in the park with some ice cream. It's the simple dates that are the best. Dinner and a movie is such a worn out concept. Blegh.

    No, you're not selfish, but you know, if you want to get to know a woman and possibly have a relationship with her, you have to put some effort into it. If she's a good woman, she will too.

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    • Good woman. They're very rare these days.

  • That's just your prerogative. I'm attracted to a guy that will pay for a girl without hesitation but that's just my prerogative

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  • I could understand that. I'm broke myself and couldn't afford going on a date. However, why not ask a girl out on a free date? Make a picnic lunch and take her somewhere free? I've done that with guys and those have been my favourite dates

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  • It's not selfish, because it's your loss.:D Those who only want free food will find another victim.But if you really like a girl, you should risk it.

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    • My loss? How is not dating a bad woman my loss?

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    • Then you have really bad luck when meeting people.:/

    • To be honest, I do. Being introverted doesn't help my case either.

  • you can be cautious but you'll probably be a virgin longer. If you don't go on the first date your chances of getting laid will be highly diminished. Women give plenty of indicators when they really like a man vs not being very into him. just don't beg a girl to date you or pursue her when its clear she's ambivalent to you and you won't have to worry about getting used for free meals

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  • LMAO dude.

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What Guys Said 1

  • For some reason, women want to be romanced before sex. It not only makes it more pleasurable for them, but it also makes them want sex more. So yes, if you like someone and you know they like you back, it would be selfish to not take them out on a date

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    • I want a woman to be into me before I take her. Sex doesn't need to happen, I don't like rushing things. If I sense a woman doesn't like me, I won't ask her out. Simple isn't it?

    • There would be no point in asking a girl out if you don't think she LIKES you, but, you'll never know, if you don't take that risk

    • Dating is supposed to be fun. This sounds like a lot of pressure.

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