Would you start dating someone knowing that it's going to end soon?

I'm a senior in college, just about to start my final semester. I'm really interested in a guy and he seems to like me too. The problem is that graduation is just around the corner, and I know that long distance isn't an option. Should I go for it anyway, knowing that there's a 99% chance that I'm going to get hurt, or should I save myself the heartache?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think a change of perspective is needed here.

    What gives something value is not the fact that you will have something forever. It's quite the opposite. The very fact you only have this short window of opportunity for a specific experience makes it so much more valuable. What causes you to feel hurt is the fact that you are trying to make this fleeting moment into an eternal moment. And when you can't do that then you say "screw it. I will only get hurt".

    It's similar to saying something like:

    "This chocolate cake will not last forever so what is the point of even eating it if the enjoyment from it will only last for a moment? And if I despite that would decide to eat it I would then feel so hurt and disappointed over the fact that the chocolate cake no longer exists."

    So my advice to you is to enjoy every moment life can bring you. Doesn't matter is it's a minute, day or a lifetime. The value comes from the experience itself and not the amount of time you experience it.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I did. I'm a senior in high school and she is a sophomore. Once I go to college, even if it is the one that's 30 minutes away, it will have to end. I'm going to have to spread my wings and go. We both know our time is ticking, but we don't care. We are only interested in enjoying it while it lasts. It's either it ends in August or if I was younger it ends in 2016. The point of our relationship wasn't permanence, but that we could be happy together and learn and enjoy each others' company. We were both completely inexperienced and we have both learned a lot about relationships and such since then.

    I know it is going to such for both of us, but all good things must end. Luckily, I've taken precautions to make sure we don't end up completely in pieces. First, "I love you" is forbidden. While we both REALLY like each other, we both know the seriousness of love. And we aren't ready for that. Second, no sex. I was already going to do this even if the relationship were to last another 2 years, but no sex means no close intimate engagement. So it heart break will only be a heart dent.

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  • I used to think exactly the same way. When I was a senior in High school, Undergrad college, and graduate college, I thought that I'm about to go to another city, so I can't start a relationship now. And I wasn't going to start a long distance relationship.

    But what you have to gain is at lease a future life-long college friend. The friends you make in college are the ones who stick around and you keep in touch with after you part your ways. I'm several years out of college now, and several of us live apart now, because we chased after those jobs that required us to move. But we still email each other and talk on the phone. And every now and then we'll see each other.

    So with that said go for it! You'll make a life long friend. And You may end up in the same city one day after you graduate. So be optimistic!

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  • If he's just a year behind you, yes, go for it. Time goes by faster than you think. You are moving away? In a shorter time than you think, so is he.

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What Girls Said 7

  • no I wouldn't….. 99% is ALOT. I wouldn't take the risk unless I'm 110% sure that its gonna work out…. for how long? doesn't matter…. as long as I know it'll work.

    y would you risk getting hurt girl? your way too valuable for that. ain't nobody worth your tears.

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  • Just because it has a potential expiry date doesn't mean it won't be worth it. If there's the possibility that you two could have some good times together I would go for it. For me the regret of never having known would be worse than the separation.

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  • I would do it. The feeling of regretting something is the worst. If I know is going to end soon and I might get hurt then I'll be prepared for the impact, not a surprise as most of the time. If I don't do it I might end thinking about it too much, thinking what could have happened, gathering regrets, no letting things go... at least I'd have good memories.

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  • Save yourself. If you go for it, you will waste your time.

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  • You're not losing anything. So just do it.

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  • nope it would be a waste of my time :)

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  • I wouldn't proceed but I hope we can be friends still...

    Ldr is hard to maintain

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