Jaded or Desperate as you get older.

Do you think that people will get more jaded or more desperate when they get into their 20s or 30s and even beyond, when they still haven't found the person they want in their life?

Are you in that life stage right now, or what do you foresee yourself becoming?

For me, I feel that the older you get, the harder it is to form memories and also bond with another person. In a sense more tired and wary. So that makes me quite desperate right now in my 20s. Because I have more opportunity when I am younger, and I really like to spend my youth (or what's left of it) and the pains of going into adulthood with this person. In a sense, settling early so that I can give more time for the relationship to mature.

  • Jaded
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  • Desperate
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  • Nothing
    75% (3)100% (3)86% (6)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • i'm 32 and happily single. I was more desperate in my 20's then now. I know my biological clock is ticking and I still have a desire for three children, all of a separate natural pregnancy. but I've come to realize that just because I haven't found the right person(s) yet doesn't mean I should just find someone even if there are no feelings involved so I can have kids. I'm gonna wait. and right now I actually have no desire to be in a relationship.

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    • Good for you. :) You seem to have a good grasp of what you want.

    • actually, I have no clue what I want, just what I don't. many failed relationships have shown that. so I'm starting over. and taking some time off from dating is helping me to focus. that way, when I do go back, I'll have a better sense of myself and what I'm looking for.

What Girls Said 5

  • I was desperate when I was between 23 - 26 years old and jaded when I was between 19 - 26 years old. Now I am neither. Slowly I'm learning to reclaim the innocence I had as a youngster and to not be so jaded, cynical or bitter about the world. It's mostly because I joined the christian fellowship and these people are always praying for a spiritual revival on campus.

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    • Good to know you found a sense of belonging and purpose. :) Finding social companions like friends or fellow christians can really help to take off the pressure of finding a partner. I remember when I was most alone I was most desperate for a girl.

  • desperate in 20s

    jaded in 30s, 40s etc

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  • Yeah some people, especially when they complain too much and cannot embrace change or choose to think differently.

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  • Nothing I believe in having another half and when the time comes

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  • How mature a relationship is depends on how mature the individuals in it are. Settling early does not guarantee a mature relationship. And supposing you don't meet that person you want to experience/make memories with? Are you going to marry just about anyone to achieve this? The point is to lead a quality life. And this pretty much depends on the choices you make while younger. So don't put so much pressure on yourself...

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    • True.. The situation I described sort of only becomes valid if you meet someone who you think has potential, but you're not sure if he's the "one". In a sense, intending to form a meaningful relationship and not be too rash about diving straight in or breaking up. But yes it really depends if said person appears. It can't be just anyone haha.

What Guys Said 4

  • I don't know it depends , keep in mind lots of people are single by the time there 30's , some haven't had relationship by then but a lot of been through failed marriages or such by that age , and there is a lot of options for singles by that age , with dating sites and singles bars etc . its not that hard to be single in that age range , there is options and singles do find dates and new relationships

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    • sometimes I think that's quite a sorry state of affair, the rate of divorces. And with the kind of hurt that they've experienced, it makes it even harder to trust someone again...

  • We're all different people, but I strongly believe it is our memories and experiences that make up who were are today. I'm 30 years old and I have had several girlfriends, including one I thought I was going to marry someday. Long story short things did not work out and I was left pretty bereft after that. I've pretty much given up on love at this point in my life. So yes, I am jaded. When I was 18 I had so much youthful optimism and wonder about it, now, not so much. I have experienced first hand the negative impacts love can have on a person's life.

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  • I'm. Too young to settle down now I think. A relationship maybe but settling down no.

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    • I have intended to start a family when I'm 30, tops. I won't force things but I'm hoping that I can find the one before then.

  • getting desperate implies waiting for things to happen.. the person you want is probably never gonna happen, like most things we want in life... so you gotta work with what you find and what you get.

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    • Is that settling? Or being reasonable? We will never know... :/

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