How do I fix things with me and this girl I "creeped" out?

Been talking to this girl i met online for 2 months now. I'm aware 2 month is too long.

Anyway she likes me, i like her. However one day though she invited me to a party and of course i accepted as she'd probably be drunk and it'd be a fun hook up. She also told me "hey my best friend is going to be there to talk to ya as she's very protective" and "my friends with benefits is going to be there too" and im like "np" cause idc lol

On the day of the party, im not getting ANY calls by her, just texts by her asking where i am, and whenever i call or text her none of it goes through. It literally felt like she blocked me but forgot? And yes I tried texting/calling via another phone and nothing happened

Anyway since i felt like she was blocking me, i remembered she was in a band. A quick google search got me to their Facebook page and i contacted one of the band members to contact the girl to tell her she might have accidentally blocked me.

He agreed no problems at all, we also started tlaking and i asked him about some of the stuff the girl said about the band, like how she draws for the band, plays guitar, they go to northen PA to go to a recording studio (we live in nj), and it turns out a lot of what she said was a lie. The person I was talking to, the girl told me they were best friends for 3 years, he said they've never met at all LOL

My real life friend suggested I should do a 1$ reverse phone look up... and well the name I found (who pays for her service plan) doesn't exactly sound German (thats the girls nationality). This was another red flag

I talked to this girl's friends with benefits, he told me him and her have never met and there was no party he was invited to.. another red flag. Also me and him discussed the stuff (all of above) i found out... he TOLD HER and now she's creeped out. she also flirted with him too while drunk on the phone right after me and her got done on the phone

Anyway how do ifix

  • You can't fix this
    87% (20)76% (16)82% (36)Vote
  • Give her time
    13% (3)24% (5)18% (8)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
"she also flirted with him too while drunk on the phone right after me and her got done on the phone"

^^^^ This was a couple days ago, before any of this argument/weird stuff. me and her flirted, then i hung up and she flirted madly with him

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Umm if you are set on fixing things you'll obviously need to give her time and then communicate with her. Only she knows what she wants and needs.
    However I would just get away from her. Sounds like she lies a lot and like she doesn't really know what she wants. I personally wouldn't get involved with someone like that. There are plenty of other women in the world.

    Also to some extent I can understand why she'd be creeped out but at the same time she kind of has no room to say anything or be mad since majority of what she's told you (if not everything) is a lie. If she was being upfront about everything about her and her life there would of been no reason for you to be suspicious and snoop around the way you did. Not saying what you did was really "right" either... but like I said... it is what it is.

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What Girls Said 19

  • Dude she's screwing with you i think move on, she totally lied to you about being in some band, she obviously feels like if she didn't tell you that you wouldn't of noticed her, i personally don't stand for lying so if i was you i wouldn't give her another chance, what else is sh going to lie about to you?

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  • uhhhhhhh... why on earth would you even wanna fix this.. she sounds like a basket case.

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  • Personally, I don't think there's any situation that's beyond fixing, but only if it pertains to a serious relationship, and/or when two people are honest with each other,(or are willing to). In your case, be cautious when dealing with her, there are too many? on her part.

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  • Why did you go through all of that? You pulled a CIA girl move Lol. But hey you did your research and I would've already been turned off by all you found out. Fuck apologizing she needs to apologize to u! But its not even worth talking to her to even get that. I feel you went a but far but not creepy far.

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  • Sounds like you got catfished.

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  • I dont know why YOU want to fix things. She clearly lied to you and dug her own grave. Why do you want to remain talking if all you know is a lie? If you do (and I dont think you should since you probably can't trust her) then just talk to her. send a message. Show that there is no hard feelings. If it was me, I would be embarrassed to be caught lying. If she is mad you you should run off, she probably has problems. Either way Its not your fault at all.

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  • I'm don't understand why you want to try and fix this. She has been lying to you about a lot of her life. She's upset because she got caught in her lies. You shouldn't waste your time on this girl.

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  • She sounds like a pathological liar if I would you, I would leave it be she sounds like a waste of time.

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  • one lie after another it sounds like to me... or maybe she's sick in the head or just playing with ur feelings... i have no repect for people like that. There are too many weirdos on the internet anyways. Maybe just the odd time u find someone whos "decent" but a lot of internet people are fuck off cases lol. And i'll bt u anything that the othr guy is actually her bf - she's a good liar lol. DROP HER!

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  • Dude screw this girl. Move on to someone who isn't a crazy liar.

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  • what do you want with her?

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  • It seems like the girl you've been talking to is not the same girl that you think you have been talking to. It seems like this girl was just trying to mess with your head, and the fact that none of her "friends" or even the "friends with benefits" guy has even met her is suspicious by yourself. I may just be better that you leave this girl alone you don't want to get involved in something that you shouldn't even be in.

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  • Well she lied to you about pretty many things. I wouldn't waste my time.

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  • She lied to you. Do you really want to fix things with a liar?

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  • I would definitely apologize for any creepy vibes you may have given her. However, she lied to you!

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  • Too much lie... Seems like she has a kind of mental disease. This is the thing you can't fix.

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  • You can't fix this. I'm sorry.

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  • well i think she's a liar who makes stuff up and she got creeped because you found out PLUS you were being a big stalker to question her 'friends', you could have left it when u told the band member to contact her on your behalf instead of quizzing him and her friends with benefits .

    why are you even interested in her? she's a liar and it sounds like you two have never met, i bet she looks nothing like her photos or is way fatter irl and she has a friends with benefits? why would you be interested in someone who is sleeping with someone else

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    • Let me guess it's stalking if men do it & it's being ''better safe than sorry'' & completely justifiable if women do it...

    • its nosey to the point of creepiness no matter which gender you are

  • I am just going to be honest, I don't think you can recover from that. I would be totally freaked out if I was her. Everyone stalks people to a point, but calling people you don't know and asking questions about her is going a little overboard.

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    • well i had no idea how to contact her. i literally had no other form of contact with her since she's not on FB

      interestingly she claimed she called me to go to the party yet i never got calls, but when we talked Saturday then i recieved calls.

    • actually i did message her on the dating site and got no reply, it was about the party

    • AU, Sorry BUT OH! HELLZ NOOO!! This bitch that QA was fooled by is THE CREEP! & only QA has the RIGHT to be freaked out about this situation. Please stop being such a feminazi it's creepy...

What Guys Said 19

  • Just because she doesn't like what you did doesn't mean you did something wrong.

    You acting like you did reinforces it in her mind.

    Stop accepting the blame.

    You didn't dig for no reason, you dug because you couldn't get through. And you have major reason to be concerned that she's lied, a lot, to you.

    I wouldn't spend too much time thinking about her unless she actually does meet you in real life and you can start figuring out what's real.

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  • why are you even still interested after all this? it doesn't seem worth the trouble. and it doesn't sound like there even was a party to even go to? there really isn't anything to fix here , best to just write it off as a bad experience and move along

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  • Bro... she's a liar. A catfish. Forget her. Trust me you'll be better off. You're just wasting your precious time on her inconsiderate lying useless ass. Just being straight up with you man.

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  • If you're looking for an actual relationship I wouldn't waste your time with her. She lies, gets drunk, and flirts/has sex pretty easily. It just sounds like the worst possible girl to have a relationship with.

    If you're just looking to hook up, which it sounds like to me, I'd still just cut your losses as it's pretty hard to make up after you enter that creep zone.

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  • Haha... She's the one that's creeped out? Sounds like you're the one being Catfished, son.

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  • you simply need to walk away your whole "relationship" is predicated on lies, you can't fault yourself for finding out the truth, it saved you from wasting anymore of your time on a liar.

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  • Yeah.. this is not worth the trouble. This why it really is better to meet people in person vs. online. But when you do meet someone you like online.. you need to get her on Skype and video chat. That should be a requirement on your part in the future. Also, she doesn't seem all that serious about the relationship so I'd probably cut my losses

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  • You should be the one creeped out here. I would run for the hills, or just forgot that the whole thing ever happened.

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  • You know what i would do :) first of all i won't care about her much , by that i mean she is crazy bit.. ch so if you don't want don't answer phone or text or do anything for her cause she is lier and other stuff.. but since she act like bi.. ch i think it is time for her to payback :) i would try to date with her , to get know her and my only aim will be take her to bed (i assume she is hot if not never answer or call back) .. i am pretty good on bed, once i had sex even if it is one night stand she tray to reach me always, and want more more more.. become lover or date or friends with benefit.. if you are not good on bed than find another thing to hurt her (by that i don't mean fiscally or something illegal) just hurt her feelings.. than you had your payback.. because of her lies, her crazy acts... etc.

    i wait your comment than i might write more

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    • after sex i would left her of course :).. or if she hurt me much or i felt much than i would portend to be good boy earn her trust than dumbed her

  • Creep is a term women use to describe men they are not attracted to, it does not mean you are a creep it means she is to childish to just say you are not attractive to her.

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  • don't waste your time with a girl like her
    if she lied about those thing don't you think that she will not lie to you about something else? maybe she will even cheat on you
    don't trust her and move to another girl that she's worthy

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  • The only wise thing to consider doing if you want to stay in touch, is to confront her with every detail and to encourage her to be open and honest now. But chance of success... small unfortunately.

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  • She's creeped out 'cause she's a ''Future Darwin Award Winner''. So you shouldn't worry too much about it & should instead go & date other women. (:

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  • Dude, RUN!!!

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  • WTF how is this with her being creeped out? You should be the one! I would run FAR... FAR away!

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  • Playing games dude, drop her

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  • Why would you want to fix anything? You're a creep, that's for sure, but she's a crazy bitch. Let it be and thank whatever supernatural being you believe in because you just dodged a bullet.

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  • Your self-esteem may be as damaged as hers if you, despite being played by her, still want a relationship with this girl. By your own account, she is fraud, which therefor makes her untrustworthy. If being lied to and given the run around isn't a glimpse of what the future will likely hold for you if you choose to enter a relationship with this girl, my good man, I don't know what is.

    A word of advice, count you losses and move on with your feelings intact.

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  • She's a liar. She has no friends with benefits. She's not really in a rock band. I mean, how do you even know what she looks like?

    If I were you I'd be more curious about the mystery of who this girl actually is. My guess, she's a lonely and pathetic obese woman who feels like the only way she can get any attention from guys is to create this alternate persona. She "blocked you" because she never really had any intention of meeting you. She was just pretending to be a real person so she could flirt and get text messages from boys.

    The way to handle this is go on the offensive. She's the creeper. You're a little creepy too, but so what? It's not like you created a fake persona. The only reason you turned into a creep anyway was because something smelled fishy. And it turns out you were right.

    Tell her that since the attraction is now gone, why not take the opportunity to be totally honest and try to learn from each other. Find out why she felt the need to lie. Find out why you feel the need to hook up with whatever random weirdo responds to your messages on whatever dating site you hangout on.

    Anyway your story is so weird I wanna know more. Please email me. 4ndrewmart1nez at gmail

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