Why would a woman chat with you online, messaging, etc and not "having time" to go on a date?

I have been chatting with a girl for a while, and we covered many topics. She had been busy looking for a new apartment, and thus telling me that she is busy, when I asked her out. When we talked, we discussed purposes in life, kids, likes and dislikes, and values, and she seemed to be interested in me. Thus I am confused on why she is busy. Thanks in advance for advice!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Girls tend to thrive on conversation in a manner similar to how guys thrive on sex. If you were having unlimited and unrestrained sex with a girl who then wanted to have an online conversation, knowing that she would continue to have sex with you even if you didn't, there would be little motivation to do so. Similarly, she seems fairly confident that you will continue to talk with her even if you never meet in person. Add to that the fact that meeting people from the internet can be dangerous and she simply has no reason to meet you in person.

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What Girls Said 3

  • maybe she doesn't meet people she knows from online?
    maybe she is not really a woman?
    maybe she feels interested in you but is skeptical about meeting a stranger?
    maybe she doesn't really like you?

    You should have a serious talk with this person about what you want and about what she wants and probably have a face to face talk through some kind of video chat on the computer or phone face time or whatever.. don't meet people blindly from online just because they sound perfect to you.

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  • Chatting with some one on line & meeting in real life, dating are 2 very different things entirely. Personally some I wouldn't mind meeting others not so much.

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  • she's not sure about you yet, she is using it as an excuse to make sure you're a nice person before meeting up with you which can be nerve wracking or she is genuinely busy and can find time for some emails but not a full date that lasts 4-5 hours

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What Guys Said 3

  • sounds like she prefers the relationship as it is right now. perhaps she isn't sure about her feelings, perhaps she is truly busy, perhaps she's got a dude, perhaps she wants to get to know you better. whatever it is it seems clear she prefers having the boundary of internet up where she can sort of control some aspect of the relationship

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  • she just wants attention

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  • Maybe she's unsure. Maybe she doesn't know what she really wants. It is a confusing one, If you are really interested in her though, and you think you have been talking online long enough. Then say to her mate, I'm not saying you have to say oh we meet or stop talking. But ask her what's happening and hopefully she'll give you more insight into why she seems to be avoiding meeting.

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