Sounds silly but... at what point do you know your in an official boyfriend girlfriend relationship?

i've been on the dating scene for so long that i've actually forgotten how it is that a couple becomes a real couple - boyfriend and girlfriend status.

im not talking about "monogamous relationship-things" that aren't labeled, or "exclusively dating" im talking about at what point to you know you're somebody's girlfriend?

in my head, and in my past, guys have always asked, "will you be my girlfriend" (cheesy, i know) and now i find myself in a "monogamous kinda sorta relationship-thing" (because we want the relationship to grow organically into one) and i'm not only confused but really not sure how it becomes OFFICIALLY boyfriend and girlfriend from here?

some help please? experience stories welcomed too!


Most Helpful Girl

  • For me, you have to discuss it. After dating or knowing that both people have feelings for each other, you get together and just say or ask that you'd like to be in a relationship. Depending on how the other person responds, you should then clarify the 'rules'- whether you will exclusive/monogamous or not, how serious each person is going to take the relationship, etc.. I think it's also a good idea to work in what you would feel comfortable in with the sexual aspect of the relationship.

    For me, I actually turned down this guy a few months prior to. We continued hanging out a lot regardless, and I began to develop feelings for him. About 5 months after I turned him down, I realized that he's not going to try again so I asked him if he still wants to be in a relationship. He right away accepted, and we proceeded to discuss if we'll be monogamous and all that good stuff.


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What Guys Said 2

  • for me if a guy asks straight away to be your boyfriend, then straight away you are official and exclusive. "Dating" is when one person is trying to keep their options open.

  • You are not official until it is said. Never assume you are a couple until then. This is something you need to talk to him about.


What Girls Said 2

  • Usually there's some sort of conversation about being exclusive…like, "I'm not seeing anyone else and don't want to." Or like other answerers said, one or the other may inadvertently call the other their bf/gf. Either way, if you're concerned about it there's no harm in bringing it up.

  • Anytime I've had the "exclusive" talk with a man I've dated I just started calling him my boyfriend and he would do the same.