Guys- Which is most important to you on a first date?

Which of these is likely to be rewarded with a second date?

  • Finding out the girl loves the same sports team/musician as you
    12% (1)5% (1)7% (2)Vote
  • The girl offering to pay/reaching for the check
    0% (0)0% (0)0% (0)Vote
  • Having a lot to talk about
    62% (5)67% (14)66% (19)Vote
  • Having sex
    0% (0)10% (2)7% (2)Vote
  • The girl being very polite/ladylike
    26% (2)18% (4)20% (6)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Going with C on this one. if we keep talking and its clear we are both very interested, thats a good date to me. it makes me feel connected and that i may have found someone very special

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    • Awesome! I've just been really curious because I know men and women tend to communicate differently, so I wondered how that compared with first dates. The sociology student in me is about to go crazy all over these polls, hahaha.

    • haha thanks.

What Guys Said 12

  • having a lot to talk about (communicating well) and the denial of sex is probably the best combo to be honest. even if the conversation was a little off at times, they'll be back for another try at getting some sex ;)

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  • Looks like most agree with me that C is more important. Having a lot to talk about makes me feel that the girl and myself have a lot in common and that's important to me.

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  • I'll go with C. It shows that we might actually have some kind of future potential. I also feel lengthy silence/awkwardness puts unnecessary pressure on me, as the guy is expected to 'chat up' the girl, so it makes me feel like I'm failing, even if its her not engaging.

    E is important to, but I wouldn't say you have to be very polite/ladylike, just don't have terrible manners.

    I don't think D is essential on a first date, so long as I beleive she will want to at some point. If she acts entirely disinterested in us being physical, like won't even let me innocently touch her or hug her, it will put me off.

    A and B aren't important but either would be a slight bonus I guess.

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    • Definitely- I've luckily never had to deal with the awkwardness of not finding things to talk about on a date, but I bet it would make the time drag on forever haha. That's interesting though that you see it as more pressure on yourself, even if she is the quiet one. I guess I've always kind of seen it as the girl needing to push the conversation, just because girls are much more talkative (not always, just in general). I figured guys might would take the 'smile and nod' approach for the most part haha. I'm gay, so I haven't ever really experienced a male-female date, which is why I'm curious about the dynamics of it.

  • I picked C and E for this one. If I'm on a date then I'm not looking for a quick hook up so D is out. B is good too because it shows she's considerate but I would be happy to pay for the first date regardless. A is good too but without chemistry or any spark or attraction it's insignificant.

    C and E are important. I like to be able to carry a conversation on a date and not be bored or for moments to get silent and/or awkward, and I like my women to be ladylike.

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    • So, if you had the choice between a more casual girl (less ladylike) that you had a lot in common with, or a ladylike girl who was nice but very different from you, which would you choose?

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    • Okay... you either meet the casual girl at a sports bar, where she wears jeans and everything. Or you meet the ladylike girl at a nice restaurant, where she wears a nice dress and heels. And she's still very nice, but she doesn't listen to the same music or watch the same sports as you.

    • Honestly, I wouldn't rule out either. I'm willing to give someone a chance even if they don't tick ALL the boxes.

  • A combination of having a lot to talk about and her acting polite (I love politeness, respectfulness and calmness). Lol at having sex

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  • Having good chemistry/liking each other followed by the girl being a lady because I also like a girl with good morals and values.

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    • Sounds like a good combination to me!

  • All of these are important things. There's really no one that's more important that the other. I've NEVER had sex on the first date. I'd say A and B could be important as it would create C, having lots to talk about. So other than sex, they're all good points on a first date

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    • Yeah, and I figured for the most part, these would all kinda lead to bonus points (maybe not the sex, if the girl wanted you to take her seriously). I was just curious about if any stood out over the rest. Is there anything else that would make you be like, "Man, this girl may really have some potential"?

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    • Oh man, really? Well, I'm sorry you've been out with what I consider the 'entitled' girls. You can never assume that a guy YOU JUST MET is wanting to pay for the food you ate. Even if he is that nice, it's really rude to assume he's going to pick up the tab and not even attempt to pay. I always, always reach for the check, even past the first date (unless they've specifically said, "I want to treat you to dinner"). I don't want someone to ever feel like it's just routine or an obligation.

    • I think it's more that I've been brought up that way. You know, to be a gentleman. Open doors, pay for meals, stuff like that. After the first date girls have offered to pay but NEVER on the first date. Never been bought a drink by a girl either! That's the downside of chivalry :)

  • Talking by far, i would like to know who the girl is first before i date or have sex with her you know?

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    • Yep, I definitely agree!

  • Everything is positive, apart from the first one, which is just neutral. I'm going to vote for having sex though, (a) because it's true and (b) because I suspect that that'll be the least popular option.

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  • definitely having a lot to chat about.

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  • C, D, and E would be most important.

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    • Just because you're the only one who's said the sex is important on a first date, I'm curious about why that is. If you did have sex on the first date, would you be likely to seek a relationship with a girl down the road? I've always heard that guys won't keep pursuing you if you have sex on the first date.

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    • Touche... hahaha.

    • If it's a good date--absolutely! There'll be PLENTY of "touché" going on! :P

  • That she makes me smile a lot

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    • That's a good answer, too! I intended on putting an answer choice like "She makes lots of jokes/makes me laugh a lot".

    • She doesn't actually have to make jokes or say funny things, just make me feel happy when I'm with her :)

What Girls Said 1

  • I picked being polite because if I was a guy I would want my girl sticking her face in her plate to eat or belching at a nice restraunt

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    • Haha, true. That would be a little embarrassing. I actually don't think I've ever known any girls who acted like that.

    • Well I think politeness can also mean having tact which is really nice. Also some people have this annoying, grumpy vibe that I find unappealing, especially when they reply "eehhh hhhhuuuuuhhh." Omg I hate that.

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