She hasn't replied to my text... can you help me prepare for the awkwardness?

So I've been on a first date with this girl, and now been trying to set up a second date.
Anyway I texted early this morning asking her if she's free Wednesday evening... and she hasn't replied. I'm due to pick her up and take her to work in a matter of hours. It'll be just us in a 20min car journey, and just us working closely together.

Do I bring it up? Or see if she does? Do I continue as normal? I know her lack of a reply is already a no anyway, unless she brings it up.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Do you two work together?
    Anyway, a good way to not do the awkward shuffle is to brush it off. If you enjoyed the date and she hated it, so be it. It's something that wasn't a date of a lifetime and you can find plenty of others. Act normal, but don't flirt with her. If you want to ask her if she received your text, do so, but other than that, don't bring it up. I don't know your situation well enough to give more advice than that, sorry.

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    • We volunteer at a charity shop, once a week for 3 hours.

      Well the date went really, really well. She said she had a great time. I saw her two days later and she again said she had a good time. I said does she want to do something in a few days time, but she couldn't due to exams, but after them we should.
      Exams are over, so I ask her for drinks. She said she was already going out, but that we should go for drinks another time.

      So yeah I had a sneaky suspicion that she wasn't interested, but in all her replies she kept giving me hope.

      So I thought I send her this text and leave it at that. No reply.

      Yeah I think I won't mention it, though I think it'll be the major elephant in the room.

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    • Something like, "yeah I thought so, no problem... friends though?"

    • Yep! And that should cut out the awkwardness as well as show that you still want to be friends with her :)

What Girls Said 1

  • There might be another reason she hasn't responded yet. How did the first date go? I would just ask her if she received the text, if you don't get a good response drop the subject and next time let her find another way to work.

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    • Very well. Great time. Ice skating, had a laugh, talked, etc.
      On the way back we were both having a laugh and singing along to the radio together. In between when I've seen her with friends she's hung around me, shown interest, etc... but if you see my reply to 100klicksaway, you'll see it's been hard trying to fix the second date!

    • I read your other reply, and I could be wrong, but It does sound like she is giving you the brush off. I have used those excuses before when I want to gently discourage someone.

What Guys Said 3

  • in hindsight, it probably would have been a good idea to have sent her the query like this?

    "are you free on Wednesday night?
    oh, just wondering if you still needed that lift today"

    :P

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    • I thought about saying that, but I've been giving her a lift every week at exactly the same time for the last 6 months, so we don't even need to confirm it.

  • You kinda have to bring it up, don't you?

    You take a girl out on a date, you text her asking for a second date but she blows you off, and you still pick her up and drive her to work? I'm not judging at all, but that seems kinda doormat-ish.

    Anyway, bring it up in a short and sweet way. It doesn't need to be awkward. "Hey, did ya get my text? I kinda wanted to take you out again". See what she says.

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    • I'm not going to be an idiot for the sake if it. She lives in the road next to me, the one I pass by to get to where we are both going.

      She's still a friend, has been a friend and I intend to keep it that way if things don't develop.

      I don't know , I think her lack of reply says it all tbh.

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    • I just don't feel like friends blow each other off like that.

    • I don't know why she's blown me off, could be that she's younger and less experienced. Or that's she's unsure, or shy, or whatever... but whatever it's done now.

      Bit yeah the new goal is just being friends.

  • Don't bring up anything. Treat her as you normally would and have a good conversation. When the opportunity arises to ask her out, JUMP ON IT IMMEDIATELY.

    You will know the opportunity is there when you're talking about something you or she likes to do and she either says she likes to / wants to / wishes to do (whatever activity you are discussing) some day, and that's when you say "Lets meet up Wednesday and...(you fill in blank here)."

    Notice I used the word "LETS." I didn't ask her any questions or do anything to indicate that I'm a passive nice guy who wants / needs something from her...

    I could give many more tips and advice, but I do not have the time nor the sufficient remaining character count to do so.

    Oh, and if she ever asks what you are doing tomorrow / this weekend / next weekend or whatever day she asks about, your reply should be "Well what did you have in mind?" This is a good way to play-flirt and find out where you stand with her based on the type of answer she gives. ...

    Good luck.

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