How long should I wait until he asks me to be his girlfriend? Why hasn't he yet?

I met this guy three months ago on NYE, he went away to work for 6 weeks right after I met him. We emailed back and forth daily. When he got back he asked me to go out on a date we did, and went on lots since the 6 weeks he's been home. He texts me every single day, he's introduced me to his friends, he's even wanted me to meet his mom.Which I have twice, but was so awkward for me because i feel like im in limbo. We waited about three weeks to have sex he said he wanted to wait because he didn't want me to think he was just after that. He is purchasing a house and has wanted me to go look at them with him to help decide. He has called me his dream girl, and has even said " not to freak you out but i imagine one day you'll live with me so i want your input" and I was like " live with you.. im not even your gf!" and in another conversation i said i would help him paint one of the rooms since it was pink, and he said he would leave it because i have a daughter. After about three weeks, I was the one that had to bring up the exclusive talk with him witch is so not like me at all. He said he wanted to be exclusive and said its not the guy that has to bring it up all the time its ok for the girl too because its 50/50. When my friends introduce him as my bf I say oh he's not my bf just friends and he doesn't intervene. How much longer should I wait? Its been three months talking he was gone for gone for 6 weeks of them and home for 6 weeks. He got out of a relationship 5 months ago and me 4 months ago. I really highly doubt he is talking to anyone else either he let me use his phone when mine died and he went to the bathroom and stuff i didn't go through it but he obviously wouldn't have left me with it if he was chatting up other girls. He also doesn't think i just assume we are dating either because of the " im not even your gf comment"

When do I walk away? two months mark? Guys why wouldn't you ask a girl to be your gf if your doing all those things.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You sound like you have a great guy, but you can't handle the fact that he doesn't follow the social plan you have laid out in your mind.

    You could be really happy with this guy, if you weren't so hung up on what you thought things should be labelled and be like.

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What Guys Said 3

  • you have 2 options. active and passive.
    ACTIVE: Why don't you ask him straightaway.. 'where is this relationship going?' 'what am I to you?'
    PASSIVE: since he hasn't asked you to be his girlfriend, means you are not officially committed and you are free to date anyone. Start dating other guys, get busy, let him know that he *MIGHT* lose you, which might motivate him to ask you. now two things can happen.
    1) he asks you to be his gf and stop dating:- YEAAAHOOO!
    2) he won't give a fuck. which means he has no love for you and doesn't give a fuck whether you are there or no. which clearly tells you to leave him and not waste your valuable youth, money and energy. So my adivce puts you in a win-win situation.

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    • I just think its so weird he hasn't asked me but introduces me to his friends a

    • oops pressed enter. i just think its weird if he would introduce me to his friends and mom and talk about me living with him and what not. i guess i will give him another two weeks then stop talking to him i think two months is long enough time for him to ask me at that point. just doesn't make sense is all... if we had exclusive talk i dont think he is dating other people but who knows never been in this position ussually a guy would ask me after like two weeks.

    • it may be weird, its important what you do now. Did you get what i said? will you do it?

  • Wait. You want to be exclusive, he wants to be exclusive, you have both talked about going exclusive, you have both consented to being exclusive, so you two are exclusive, right? And if you are exclusive, then he is your boyfriend, right? And if he is your boyfriend, then why the hell did you tell your friends that he was not your boyfriend? And what do you expect him to say to your friends about that? That you are a pretty little liar? What kind of game are you running here?

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  • If you want to be his girlfriend, ask him yourself. It shouldn't always be the guy to have do to it.

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