He isn't sure if he loves me, how can we figure out if he does or ever will?

My boyfriend and I never had a serious talk about it before and where we stand. I felt it was necessary and brought it up. He was telling me our relationship has taken longer for him to develop feelings in comparison to others which isn't a bad thing because we are trying things differently. And it took time for him to miss me and sometimes he just really wants to be with me and then some timers he is ok being in his apt alone. And he knows feeling wise I really do love him, and he told me he was going to tell me he loves me but he wants to be 100% with that and sometimes he feels it and sometimes he doesn't - we realized that is an issue and he wants to try taking every route to work on that.
What are ways to have him realize if he loves or ever will or if that is not something that will happen?

Also is it bad that sometimes he does and sometimes he doesn't have the feelings there?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Hmmm, I've been on your end before. My girlfriend at the time would be going through the motions. I thought it was her womanly emotions, but it was too constant.

    In the end she didn't want to be in a relationship. She wanted to have fun and party. Not get tied down and not be able to do what she wants.

    I'm not saying this could be what's happening in your case, but just brining my experience to the table.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I don't think he loves you, but like and have passion for you, why worry about that anyway? Why is that a issue? It's about being happy with each other and then loves come naturally

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  • Hot girls = instant love. Just saying.

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What Girls Said 2

  • That has to be very painful. I'm sorry that you're going through this :(
    Unfortunately there is nothing that you can do to make him realize he loves you... That comes naturally or with time. My friend dated this guy for years in the same situation, and he never made up his mind. She kept thinking that it would change, but it didn't.

    Don't rush anything... Let things run their natural course and just enjoy each other. Unless you are the type that is all or nothing- go find someone who knows what they have and knows they love you.

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  • Not sure = Doesn't love you in my opinion.. You either love someone or you don't, there is no wishy washy "oohhh i dunnnooo" crap. You do or you don't. The End.

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    • I mean he tells me it is there sometimes and not others but is that weird and how do we make it either yes or no

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    • How do I work on that

    • I would NEVER work to make a man love me.. so I'm not sure. I suppose you would compromise a lot and be super nice to him? not really sure...

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