When is the right time to ask?

I split up with my ex boyfriend of 18 months as I found out he didn't want children. We never thought to have the conversation and I was heartbroken as I loved him but I've always wanted children in the future.
I'm now in a new relationship, of 5 weeks, and I'm not sure when to ask him about the future and children and what not. Obviously I don't want children now, but I don't wanna be in a relationship for a year thinking we may have children and then he tells me he doesn't want to. But I also don't want to ask yet as it may scare him off when I talk about babies etc - although I don't want them now.
So when is the right time to speak about it?


Most Helpful Guy

  • You're really rushing into children. I would say you find someone compatible, and if you're to the point where you're talking marriage, THEN you broach the subject on wanting children or not.

    • So I could waste my time again for over a year and find out he doesn't want them? I'm not rushing into children I already said I don't want them like right now.

    • But you're expecting a life changing answer within a year, AND claiming you're "wasting" your time by being in a relationship in your 20s with a guy who may not know what he wants. If you were 35, I'd have a different answer, but you have plenty of time.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I wouldn't ask specifics. Or ask if he wants kids with you. Thats way too soon. But your last experience should show that it's important to talk about things before you're "in to deep"

    If you spend a night at his place or something, and your in bed talking, ask what he sees his future like? What are his goals? Where does he see himself? All that kind of stuff. In addition to getting that "do you want kids" talk out of the way you'll learn more about each other too

  • Play 20 questions and ask him.

  • Its been 5wks already so why not ask him. It wouldn't feel weird for me if u ask. U going to waste another long years with the same guy if u dont ask him head on. Best to ask early on so u know what to expect.


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