Are there many women who will not date/marry a guy with less or equal income?

I was looking at some videos online and a lot of people say that women will not settle down with a guy if the guy is not earning more money than them. But I also see a lot of women claiming that money doesn't matter. Some also say they are a breadwinner in their own marriage. There are also stories of women leaving their men when they lose their jobs.

So I'd like to hear what others have to say on this. I personally feel that men don't even look at a woman's income but do notice things like an article on okcupid showing statistics of women messaging the higher income men. I have seen comments about men need to be "successful" and such. But what really defines "success?" I personally feel if a person is happy with their life that is successful but sometimes their partner "wants more."


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm going to be honest here:

    I think it's a holdover from when women were discouraged from having an active, natural interest in sexual and social bonding with men. If you can't be with a partner who you are very attracted to and get along with well... what is there? Well, financial comfort, for one.

    I think women who trust that they can have a genuine connection with men on a sexual and emotional plane are less likely to fret about what a man makes, as long, of course, as the two of you can provide for children. But I think women who are taught that men will only enjoy visual and domestic support from her and never really bond will "play" men in order to get financial security.

    I think both men and women crave a deep, sensual connection. But it's hard to reach that high ambition. So we settle; men usually for sexual stimulation and women for financial security.

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What Girls Said 8

  • It's dangerous to say that women need to go for a lower paid job. Everyone should achieve as much as possible. Personally I think intelligent women who don't aim for something big in life are just wasting their potential. Why should a woman with great medical knowledge rather become a nurse than an actual doctor? Just because society expects her not to earn too much money? That's bullshit thinking.
    Personally I am definitely aiming for something big in life. And my partner shouldn't have any influence on this. I will also not blame him for not earning enough money, that's stupid.

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    • I definitely never said that women should go for lower paying jobs. What I am saying is that apparently people feel that if let's say the nurse was a doctor and had a very strong desire to date a career-oriented man, that she'd only be looking at potential dates earning higher than a doctor's wage.

    • Sorry, I wasn't claiming that it's your opinion, I was generally speaking, sorry for sounding like that.
      Well, there are some gold-digger women, but I think those that are truly intelligent won't go for this. That's what makes a woman truly intelligent, actually.

    • I've seen comments like that before. I think they're just bitter men. Since the update I'm seeing less Q's about "gold diggers" luckily as they're mainly just rants.

  • I was with a guy for a year who made less then I did. it didn't bother me so much that he made less. what bothered me so much is that he has many skills and could be putting those skills to better use. he had better job opportunities which paid more and didn't want to leave his current job because he could walked to work if he wanted and he would have had to drive about forty minuets to the other job, but he would have tripled his income. between the two of we never had to live without anything, but now that we are not together he is going to finically struggle. we didn't breakup because of money. money can't buy me love.

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  • No, I'm fine with dating/marrying someone who makes less than I do. But I don't want that fact to be thrown in my face all the time. I don't want to deal with him feeling emasculated by me. There's just no way to successfully address those feelings of insecurity.

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  • I believe it.
    I take every study I see on the internet with a big bucket of salt but one study read that in most marriages the guy is making more money.
    I would say whatever to that but I mean, every couple I have ever come across the dude has a job that sounds more high paying.

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  • Now that I think about it, I think I have never dated a guy who had a higher income than me. And my income isn't even that high. Well, I guess that kind of answers the question.

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  • Nope. I'm fine with dating and marrying someone who makes less than me. They just need characteristics that make them a keeper, like trustworthiness, dependability and someone who I can connect with at all levels.

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  • I wouldn't mind as long as the guy had a good attitude to working and wanted to achieve the highest income they could.

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  • I will not marry a man that makes less than me.

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What Guys Said 3

  • If you're trying to get married and you're using money as a way to do it, you're doing everything wrong...red pill bro

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  • The way I see it, if you're going to school and earning a college degree of some sort, what's the problem?

    If you striving to educate and better yourself, and aspire to work a premium job, where is the issue? It's something that anyone should want to do anyway and that just so happens to be what typically attracts a good woman, one who is smart and attractive... the kind that you'll want to come home to every day. They're looking for a man that can provide.

    If a woman leaves her husband because he lost his job, that's her problem. I'd like to think that most women aren't that terrible, but I'm sure there would reach a point where that may be an acceptable eventual outcome. No woman of value wants a man that is repeatedly incompetent. Why would they? There may be rough patches and that's ok, but there comes a time where as a man, you have to get it together and pull through.

    That's just how life works in higher class society. If someone isn't able to deal with that, then they'd better be able and willing to settle for less. It's a dog eat dog world out there. Success is defined by how high you are on the totem pole and it all depends on how bad you want it.

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  • While a lot of women are drawn to successful men, it is not as big a factor as some guys make it out to be. Ambition is always a good quality to have and it will certainly help, however lots of guys like to paint all women as gold diggers because it's easier than to take responsibility for their lack of success with girls.

    I will tell you this: my girlfriend was with me when I had NOTHING! I'm doing very well these days, but she was with me when I had no money, no status, no career and she loved me just the same.

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