She's busy twice in a row...not interested?

Woman asked me out for drinks twice, once during the day and another at night, and seemed interested and shared personal details, asked when I would next be around and what my schedule was like etc. but also tried playing games which I called her out on and she admit she does play games to see how the guy reacts. We hung out again, where she extended the hang out for a few more hours and she was enthusiastic.

Next time we hung out (group setting) she invited a guy to drinks as we were leaving, and then started being openly flirty with him which I assumed she did to try to make me jealous, I ignored it and left as I had other plans to attend to.

A couple of days later she would hover around me in that same group setting, be receptive and give me advice but was not as open to PDA. I figured she needed some space and I went on my way, but shot her a text the next day asking her if she wanted to go for drinks later. She replied she had already promised a friend that she would catch up with him next week. I said no worries and stopped contacting her for a couple of weeks then saw her again in a group setting, where she would hover around me, noticed a few little things about me but I could tell she wasn't really in a good mood. Again I left, but shot her a text a couple of days later and she replied almost 2 days later apologizing for the late reply but she had been busy with her college work and would continue to be busy for the next week or so, ending the text with a request for a rain check but no actual time. I told her no problem and put the ball in her court to contact me.

I've noticed she acts differently than before (but she's always been somewhat hot cold) but she still keeps hovering around me all the time. If I start talking to anyone else, lately she'll be quick to come and join the conversation (regardless if it's a guy or girl) but she won't approach me openly as she did, but she doesn't behave like this with any of the other guys in our classes.


Most Helpful Guy

  • She asked you out for drinks, twice..clearly you weren't taking the LEAD in the interactions with her.
    Another thing is NEVER, EVER date a girl in GROUP setting, cause the chance is you're going to get teased, cockblocked, and you can't pay full attention in the interactions with her.
    If she doesn't accept your invitation giving so many B.S excuses, it's DONE. Move on to next girls, when she reaching back to you, set another date again, remember, when a girl texts/calls/reaches out to you, assume SHE WANTS TO SEE YOU. Set another date, get out of the phone.

    • I didn't date her in a group setting, it's always been one-on-one when we went out (except when she invited that guy) by group setting I mean, we were hanging out in a group then transitioned it to just us. The first time for drinks was coffee and exchanging details, the second time was drinks. I then initiated all attempts from there on in.

    • When she invited with a guy, clearly she has no romantic interests with you. You going to move and see another girls lol


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • She is a bitch and rude! She invited someone else to a drink while you were there! hello? This happened to me a with me ex.
    I don't think she is playing games, she is just a bitch.


What Guys Said 3

  • If she's busy twice in a row then she's not interested.. Even if she is, you should at that point should stop being interested. A woman who's interested will pick up your call at 4am in the morning.

    • Agreed, but then why is she still hovering around me all the damn time? Every time I come in, she'll always be in proximity, leave her friends behind to be around me, keep staring, etc.

    • You can never truly know why a lady does anything. But you shouldn't be concerned about her behaviour. You've showed interest and she's rejected that interest twice. Stop paying her so much attention, you've got to always believe inside yourself that your better than her and your time and attention is a commodity that shouldn't be exploited.

  • Leave her. Girls who play games are not worth your time

  • She's still playing games with you. She wants to see how far you'd go to get her. Some women just do that, to feel valued. The question is: do you want to put all that effort into getting her? If yes, you know what to do but know that you'll get stripped of your manhood a couple of times. If it's worth it, is up to you.

    She sounds like an interesting woman to be honest, but not sure if she is fit for a relationship.

    (if some of you could answer this question? /dating/q992041-is-she-just-using-me-for-attention )