Alright, before I ask anything, I want to clarify that this isn't some 'fishing for compliments' question. I *do* suffer from low self-esteem to the point that I'm seeing a therapist and take anti-anxiety meds to help me about it.
OK, first things first, I haven't been called ugly a single time in my life. I have had a share of compliments classifying me as 'cute' or 'handsome', and the occasional 'extremely attractive' from older women. I see myself as pretty normal though. You might think it's rude to just disregard the positive comments, but since I'm a realist, I judge by the facts: my dating game is far below average. So to me, the compliments don't quite connect with reality.
Of course, I know it's not all about looks. I've been hearing about confidence a lot lately, and there's proof about how it works whenever I see an average guy with a hot girl. As for high-school, when I had only one relationship and that was in the final year, I was deadly shy, short, and looked like a 12-year-old, so I guess none of these traits helped. But now I'm working my butt off to be more social, more open, and more daring. Indeed, I manage to get a date with a girl I approached in the bus, but that was the end of it. Overall, the last two years I've had neither a serious relationship nor sex, and the latter is starting to get me!
Again, I'm not trying to be a jerk. I struggle to the point of depression with this matter, since one of the most fulfilling things in life for me is romance. My argument is: I know that men are supposed to make the first move, but if I'm *that* attractive, shouldn't I get hit on every now and then?
Most Helpful Girl
Ok, no shrink will help you as much as you can help yourself! Practice in front of a mirror. Start by saying Hi to the person. Then say something sweet or compliment the person in front of you. Start a random conversation. If you feel shy, stop. Close your eyes for a minute and think if you want to be that person who everyone pities for the rest of your life. Think on the lines that if you can talk more casually with the girl in front you'll gradually start moving over depression and have a better life. Pen down your weak points in a journal, the reasons why you feel shy and awkward. Try going out as much as possible. Join a public speaking course. It helps a lot! Also, give yourself some rest. Down a drink or two if it'll help. Go out as often as you can with your friends. You only get one life to enjoy. Dont regret your past now. Try making a better future. Time is in your hand. TRY!! You dont have anything to lose!0