(Skip to last paragraph if you don't want many details) I'm a pretty quiet and reserved person so it's no surprise I have a hard time getting close to people. I have a few close friends but my circles are small. I was always jealous of my friends who began dating guys so easily and had so many boyfriends and here I was alone. Although often told I am pretty I was never seriously pursued by someone I was interested in.
I recently began dating this guy and he is my first real relationshipWell now he and I hangout constantly, usually just at his place. I don't think I am capable of being the kind of girl he wants. His recent ex is the complete opposite of me and they were very serious. I am no where near ready for the the type of relationship he wants. I have trouble saying how I feel, accepting compliments, and I am nowhere near ready for sex which I think he is accepting in the nearish future. He hasn't pressured me at all but he's made a few "jokes". I like the idea of a boyfriend but now that I have the real thing I'm not so sure. I don't know if I should break it off before real feelings are involved or if I should try and let someone into my bubble no matter how difficult it may be. I'm just afraid he won't find I am worth it.
Most Helpful Guy
I actually think you should stick it out a little longer. He seems to be treating you well, and running away isn't going to make you any more ready for a boyfriend later on. I think this experience will be good for you in the long run. A fear of rejection is very common for shy people without a lot of experience. It sounds like your fear of rejection, and that is the only reason you are thinking about ending it.
You really shouldn't compare yourself with his ex. She is his ex for a reason. When dating we often go through all sorts of people in order to learn what we are looking for.
You say you don't think you can be what he wants, but he is already with you. Clearly he already likes you as you are. You will get more comfortable with him in time and that is normal. Eventually you will stop worrying about trying to be the type of girl he likes, and simply be yourself.
In any relationship you run the risk of getting hurt by letting people in. That fear won't go away as you get older. You just have to learn to accept it, and go for it. The only other option is to remain alone, and that is very painful. Humans are by our nature social creatures.
I really think you need to let him into your bubble, so you can learn to be more comfortable with him, before having sex. If he doesn't pass that test, then he clearly doesn't deserve you. The right guy will know you are worth it.1